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Look! Up in the sky!

Yesterday I was thoroughly irradiated and also forced to walk down several long hallways wearing no pants and one of those hospital gowns that open in the back. Therefore, I have selected the superhero name suggested by Pam, The Pantless Wonder!

The most annoying part of the experience was that, having made me wander the halls carrying my clothes and with my nether regions hanging out, after the test they pointed out that there was a lovely private bathroom attached to the exam room where I was free to change back into my clothes. Um, hello? Would it have killed you people to let me change in there to begin with? And avoid the creepy looking lab assistant guy who kept eyeing me like he was about to grab me and lick my neck? Also, since you people answer your phone saying "Big Scary Hospital, may I help you?" do you think you could maybe mention to new patients that you are not actually in the, you know, hospital? Whatever.

Today, sadly, not only do I not glow in the dark, but I find myself entirely unable to fly. I also cannot bend steal or talk to dolphins or turn myself into a bucket of water or deflect bullets. I did develop x-ray vision for a few minutes yesterday, but unfortunately it only allowed me to see various bits of my own internal organs and therefore I am still entirely in the dark as to the precise form and style of Clive's butt. I would not be so upset about this, only I already bought the cape and the go-go boots and now I am going to have a harder time finding places to wear them.

Comments (12)

luckily halloween is right around the corner....go-go boots and a cape always come in handy during halloween!.....and even if you don't have the superpowers you'd always hoped for...we will still call you the Pantless Wonder....and read any posts you might want to write without your knickers on :)

I think that outfit could be quite useful on casual Fridays, or just to the random happy hour.

"already bought the cape and the go-go boots and now I am going to have a harder time finding places to wear them"

something about Mr Fish and hookers and crack comes to mind. = )

Well - with Rick James gone now -- perhaps you could start your own FUNK band and become the Queen of Funk -- the cape and boots would be perfect for the transition!

I have to say, you're not missing much... Clive Owen's butt is not all it's cracked up to be. (bahaha.)

uh hello?
Capes go with EVERYTHING!

Come ON - go go boots and capes are the new thing. They go with anything and every occasion. Wear the outfit to work and convince everyone that you truly are superwoman!

I think it's really cool that you glow in the dark. I'm still hooked into buying bags of those glow-in-the-dark skull rings every Halloween, and I'm almost 40, um, I mean 30, years old. Maybe you could rent yourself out for parties this year...

Seriously, though, I'm sorry you had such a lousy time at the not-hospital. Humiliating people and breaking their spirit must be a large part of the healing process, or why would so many medical professionals practice such things?

next time you have to go be humiliated by walking down the hallway in a hospital gown, ask if they have a private bathroom that you can use to change. eheh. sucks that you didn't get any superpowers, but the cape/go go boots will work well for halloween. or, y'know, just everyday wear. ;)

I think you should wear the outfit the next time you have a phone interview, so you have super confidence! And if you get too depressed make Mr. Fish wear it! *grin*

Damn ... the cape *and* the go-go boots, eh? That sucks.

At least you didn't also get the matching wrist-thingies. You might find some use for the boots and the cape one day, but those wrist-thingies are NEVER coming back in style.

You can't talk to dolphins? I'm sorry to hear that - I have, on several occasions. I mean, they probably don't understand me, and I can't understand them, but hey, I can still talk to them.

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So the Fish Said...

Whoever you are, now I place my hand upon you, that you be my poem, I whisper with my lips close to your ear.

- Walt Whitman

Meet the Fish

I want to get a pet duck and keep it in the bathtub.
I am addicted to chap stick and altoids.
I am freakishly flexible.


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