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This one is not about my birthday

So, Chris and I are trying to get knocked up so we can have a child upon which to inflict all of our various neuroses. The latest piece of the continuing saga is that we are now having sex (now known around the house as The Sex) on a very strict schedule dictated by my doctor. I tell you this only so that I can relate the following conversation we had last week.

Him: Do you want to have The Sex now?
Me: I thought you were going to take a shower.
Him: I was, but if I take a shower before The Sex I'll have to take another one after, so I thought it would be more efficient this way.
Me: Oh, that makes sense. Ok, just let me brush my teeth first.
Him: We've taken every bit of romance out of this, haven't we?
Me: Pretty much.

Don't feel bad for me though. I may not have much romance lately, but I still have lots of The Funny and lots and lots of The Sex. Things? They could be worse.

Comments (29)

Don't forget the bling and all of those purses.

Oh yeah, sorry to be a comment whore, but hubby and I have always called it " All of The Sex" ...a Friends reference between Phoebe and Chandler.

At least you have a sense of humor about it.

Plus, you know, at least you still get to have The Sex, even if it is all scheduled and whatnot.

We call it The Sex too! Only we aren't so regimented about it. Yet. Only a matter of time, though....

Wear the bling during around the house sex and you'll feel a bit more romantic about it. LOL

Imagine the stories you'll have to tell your grown children one day!
Ok, maybe

Good luck with all The Sex. I can say this honestly without exhibiting the slightest bit of jealousy. Really. I'm not jealous of someone having lots of the Sex. At all. Seriously. Not a bit.

Ok, maybe I am. Good luck, anyway!

Otay, how in the hell do I get my doctor to prescribe The Sex?

(mechanical is fine, I'll work on the romantic/spontaneous/intimate shit later)

So, do you like talk about work and stuff when you are having The Sex, or do you actually get into it and all?

well, your household is clearly far more mature than mine. we call it "the doin' it".

LOL! Our pre "the sex" conversations are similar...not because we're trying to make a baby but because we already did! We have a toddler sleeping with us and must arrange to go to the spare bedroom to do it.

I was also thinking of the Friends reference. Also, the efficiency makes me laugh. Oh to be so effecient.

You might as well get used to it now. Kids suck most of the romance out of the relationship anyway. :-)

I dont think MrZ and I have had The Sex in the last year during any times which was NOT part of The Schedule. And yes - I'm feeling a bit like we've lost the romance too...hehe.

And this months addition to the regiment? Boxer Shorts for the week prior to The Sex. Not for me...for MrZ. Evidently boxer briefs anger The Sperm. and make them uncooperative. hehee.

Ok between your post and Zoot's comment I'm dying over here.... snarfsnarfsnarf at least you are honest about why you want one....heh....and life without the The Sex would definatly be worse

Isn't this normal foreplay? I don't see what's different...

Well even if The Sex isn't as romnatic when done to The Schedule, at least it retains The Fun. Good Luck!

Ummm, is that really the mental image you want me carrying around with me all day. How about this one as payback. At any one moment while you are having The Sex I may be thinking about you doing that so in a way it would be like I was watching you! Feeling really uncomfortable about now aren't you? ;-)

You have The Funny, The Sex AND The Bling. Things could definitely be worse.

all i can say is The Sex must be pretty good if it requires showering afterwards (can you tell it's been a while for me?)
i know so many people workin' on making babies... but so far noone's mentioned trying it in the back of their car parked behind the movie theater - that worked really well for all my friends back in high school!

this post amused me :) it seems nothing gets you two down, and you've consistently looked on the bright side throughout the whole experience, making jokes and involving your online readers. i'm on the sidelines cheering you both on...(not REALLY, as that would be very odd. so please, don't picture me in a cheerleading outfit and i won't mentally visualize The Sex.) *applauds*

Aren't you glad you married such a romantic guy? ;-)

Oh, crap, now I'm picturing tiffanie in a cheerleading outfit.

Give me an F!

Give me a ... Oh, you know the rest.

My doctor said I can't have a prescription for The Sex, she said we had to work it out amongst ourselves. Darn it!

OMG...I so remember The Sex....9 years of The Sex....which everyone knew was going on..Gah! I also remember setting the alarm clock at 2am so we could part take in The Sex on such a regular basis as to always have active swimmers swimming...too much information? Yeah..probably ;)

Well in that case, may The Sex be with you and may the god Lord bless with many of the offspring (all at the same time) He he he.

"Him: We've taken every bit of romance out of this, haven't we?" doesn't get any better after the kids come. But somehow that's okay. I wish you guys all the luck in the world! It's one hell of a ride, that's for sure.

May The Force be with you during The Sex. The Baby-Making Force, that is. ;)

Just wait, after enough of "The Sex", you start thinking things like "aren't you done yet?" Don't say that out loud. I know from experience, that comment is not handled well.

Good Luck. My household is currently partaking in "The Sex" as well, but not as scheduled - yet. HAHA.

Hey, don't feel bad anyway...druzba and I talk like that about sex now and we're not trying to have another baby. :)

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