so the fish said...
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Who needs coherence?

Item One: Would someone on my notify list please let me know whether you get all of my notifications twice? I get them twice and I thought I had figured out why and how to only get them once but when I tried it I didn't get it at all. Also, if you are getting my notifications twice would some smart and lovely MT guru like to tell me what my problem is? Also also, I don't think there's any way to unsubscribe to my list other than asking me to take you off, so if you want to unsubscribe just let me know and I promise to keep my tears and depression to myself and not inflict my deep and enduring sadness on you.

Item Two: The group I work with is promoting some people and this week I got to do all the interviews. They told me I got to do all the interviews because I was so important and reliable and clever and brilliant and really, really sexy. The real reason is that nobody else wanted to do them so I got volunteered. I did 109 interviews in two and a half days. Ok, it was only 25 interviews, but it felt like 109. And really, since I was already so busy with other things this week it was 25 interviews in three half-days. I asked the same 16 questions all 25 times and took copious and illegible notes and tried very hard not to yawn or doze off during the interviews.

One of the women I interviewed told me I was a bitch during the interview. I recommended her for the job anyway because hey, she was only telling the truth.

Item Three: Earlier today, I happened to be near our old apartment and decided to go check out the old place. This is the apartment we had before we were married - over 5 years ago. It was not a nice place. Actually, it was a pretty crappy place but we were young and poor and it was what we could afford. I will give you an example of the crappiness. Up the hill from our apartment was another apartment complex. One night, someone at that other complex got shot. This is in Reston people. Rich, yuppie, outer suburban Reston. Anyway, our crappy old apartment complex where Chris got electrocuted by the oven hood and you got third degree burns in the shower if someone eight doors down and two floors up flushed the toilet and where directly below us there were 23 people living in a two bedroom apartment has built itself a huge, new, beautiful leasing center. The buildings are exactly the same, the non-existent landscaping is the same, there are still holes in the parking lot big enough for children to go swimming, but they have a leasing center. It looks like a much nicer apartment complex brought it's leasing center over to visit and then forgot to take it home.

Item Four: I finally got off my butt and got Chris a birthday present. If he doesn't like it I am going to punch him in the spleen. Does anybody know where your spleen is? I want to be sure my aim is accurate.

Comments (27)

1) I only get them once, I think.

2) Did that woman really call you a bitch?
3)That's all.

i only get them once. :) doesn't it feel good once you've decided on a gift for your significant other? i felt huge relief once i bought dave's birthday and christmas gifts. yes indeed.

2) holy crap....Nu-huh...She didn't!...and you didn't ...really...that's the funniest thing I've read all day..hahahaaaa

4) I think the spleen is somewhere in the middle

Your spleen is on your left, right under your rib cage and above aparently where your stomach is. I know because I have had mono and mine almost 'sploded.

Also? I only get one notification. Not two. I feel left out.

She was wearing pink, wasn't she?

As I recall, you kind of pride yourself on being a b. at work. ;) I can't believe she said that to you though.

I don't know where the spleen is but there are other sensitive spots.

The spleen is to the left and above your tummy -- it's kind of hard to punch, though. I know this because I often want to punch my boyfriend in the spleen, but can't get to it. =D I love that word. Spleeeeen. Everytime they say it in class I giggle, lol. I'm a freak, I know.

I don't even know what a spleen is :)

i actually enjoy the interview process. people are fascinating; i've been told the most incredible things during interviews (and oh my god! the resumes! i'm convinced that i could make a killing simply by teaching people how to write a proper resume and cover letter). the whole process is time consuming though. no doubt about that. that's why i like the 15 minute pre-interview interview. if people don't impress me in the first fifteen minutes then i see no point in spending an hour on them.

Damn... you're an aggressive gift-giver. It must be murder at Christmas time. ;-)

People beat me to the spleen thing. But, just remember - Chris's left will be your right.

OK, no, saying you're a bitch is NOT telling the truh. You are not a bitch. But could you give more details of that situation. What made her say that? I'm SO curious!!

[quote] It looks like a much nicer apartment complex brought it’s leasing center over to visit and then forgot to take it home. [/quote}

*rolls on floor laughing*

If he doesn't like it just trade it in for a handbag for yourself. You could always use another handbag. Right?

How does one get away with calling another person a bitch to their face there? We can't even call someone short we'll get hit up with a harrassment claim so fast. lol As for the possible punching of Mr. Fish in the spleen should he not like his birthday present? I'm with LOUP! Sounds like a perfect opportunity to exchange it for a new purse. :)

My spleen is a bitch.

In reverse order because I am backwards:

  1. I'm sure Chris will love his present. Try not to injure any baby-making parts on him until AFTER you become pregnant.

  2. After we left our old apartment, the management redid the kitchen. I'm told it looks beautiful, but my mortgage is less than my rent so I could care less if the kitchen is beautiful.

  3. People who are honest are overrated.

  4. Thanks for reminding me to sign up for your notify list.

I get called a bitch a lot too...all strong women do at one point or another!! And everyone else already told you where the spleen was....I feel spleen incomplete LOL!! And I died laughing at the leasing office thing!!

So I am sitting here in NH reading your post about your old crappy apartment when I nearly fainted dead. Why, you may ask? I grew up in Reston. My folks still live there and I was actually just down there in September for my 20th SLHS reunion. Small world!

So, was this apartment off of Glade??

1) I am proud of you that only one person had the balls to tell the truth, I am proud of you that you had the balls to be a bitch, and I am even more proud that you actually submitted them for the job even though they were honest. That takes balls.
2) As far as reliving the crappy? It helps us recognize the great we have now and appreciate our humble beginnings in order to understand where others are. (was that sappy enough to earn me a great christmas present?)
3) Chris? If he knows what's good for him, he'll adore what you got for him for his birthday. Otherwise, if you really need to know, I will research where exactly the spleen is and find out the most damaging sort of blow you can do. Let me know.

I only get them once Beth!

Once, I got called a bitch by my mentor-ish sort of person, who is a city councilperson, in the lobby of the church. Also, I wrote an email to someone completely in point form the other day because I couldn't be bothered with conjunctions.

I can help you with the spleen problem. Just let me know if you need advice.

BTW, when is his birthday?
PS. Considre not volunteering at work - it's usually not a good thing to do

The spleen id too amateur night, go for the adams apple!

I thought you were going to break into "The Old Apartment" there, what your not a BareNaked Ladies fan?

I'm scared of the MT notify function.

This is way off the subject, but... I wouldn't mind putting some Jude Law behind me too ;)... mmm mmm mmm

(Sorry dear, but I can't comment that far back)

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So the Fish Said...

Whoever you are, now I place my hand upon you, that you be my poem, I whisper with my lips close to your ear.

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