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One down, two to go

Today is the first day of my second trimester. (Theoretically anyway, I still think the dates are a bit off.) I am down to four pairs of work-appropriate pants that still fit. The pants I'm wearing today are not included on that list and I'm a getting a little worried about the seams. I'm wearing a v-neck sweater today that I've had for ages and just looked in the mirror and realized that I am exposing a very unprofessional amount of cleavage. Now it's not that I've been flashing my coworkers for years without noticing, it's that I've never had this problem before because I've never had this cleavage before. Does anybody have a scarf that I can borrow?

I had hoped that hitting the second trimester would finally ease the low-grade hysteria I have been feeling since finding out that I was pregnant. Nope. If anything, my constant fear that something is going to go wrong at any second is even worse today. I have decided that my doctor is wrong and that the random stomach pains I have been experiencing since before I even knew I was pregnant are not gas, like she said, but instead a dark and ominous sign that Something Is Not Right. Today I'm convinced they are cramps, even though I feel exactly the same as I felt last week and the week before that and the week before that. Do not try to be reasonable with a pregnant woman! I expect this will last right up until the baby is born, at which time I will shift to worrying that the baby isn't breathing.

Anybody want to make bets on how long I can hold out before calling my doctor and insisting that they see me today? I'll even give you hints. I have a meeting at 9:30 and think I can hold out at least until it starts, so the window of opportunity is probably somewhere between 10:30 and oh, let's see.. 10:35.

Anyway, to distract myself from worrying about every single thing in the world, I have decided to compile a list of Things I Am Not Allowed To Do:

- Clean the litter box
- Pick up my cat. He weighs 16 pounds, my limit is 15. This rule is frequently broken.
- Use any cleaning product whatsoever.
- Do any housework. Except laundry.
- Carry groceries.
- Take out the trash.
- Go into my own back yard.
- Walk on any amount of snow or ice. Or wet pavement for that matter.
- Refer to myself as fat, or suggest that I will be getting fatter.
- Stay up past 10:00 on weekends, 9:30 during the week.
- Fail to finish a single bite of any meal my husband is watching me eat.

My doctor's office just opened. The internal battle begins!

Comments (34)

How much is a professional amount of clevage? I think I must be very unprofessional indeed!

I had a cramping pain with all four kids. It was a constant niggling worrying thing... but all examinations came to the same conclusion... I was fine. But it never stopped me going for the extra checks. I will give you until 10:33am ;)

You probaby already have one, if not, get one. I bought myself one of those little heart beat monitors for at home, and when I went through worried times, I'd just sit and listen to their heartbeat until I felt better. Sometimes it took all day of regular heartbeats to make me feel better!

No matter how many children I've cared for, I ALWAYS check for breathing. I know it's irrational and that I run the risk of waking the kid up, a kid that I've probably had to fight to get to sleep in the first place. But no matter. After 30 mins or so of quiet I'll inevitably find myself in the child's room, staring at them in the dark, hoping to see the tummy moving. If that doesn't happen then I'll lean in to listen for breathing. And yes, I totally get how creepy this could potentially be for the child. :D

A few weeks ago, while babysitting for a friend, I did this very thing. When I walked into the room I discovered the child sitting up, quiet, not doing a thing. I turned the light on to ask the 2 year old if she was ok. The response I got back was: "Tricia, can you turn that off? It's bothering my friends." She wasn't sleeping, but all of the stuffed animals she sleeps were. Silly me.

But if the laundry basket weighs more than 15 pounds, that's out too, right? Just checking.

I suspect the worrying doesn't stop until the kid is 37.

The cramping is ligament stretching, honey-- your stomach and uterus stretching out around your growing baby. It's very normal, but disconcerting because it does feel like you are going to get your period.

I had some wee spotting at 12 weeks, too, and promptly burst into tears. My neighbor was an ob-gyn, so I ran over to his house and he just suggested I rest for a couple of days, so I did, and it went away.

You are post-12 weeks-- the chances of the pregnancy miscarrying are so very low now. Put your mind at ease, deary.

I haven't stopped worrying yet!!!

I think I may adopt your list as my own, as I now only follow one of your rules which is the cat litter thing. Two (almost to go...woohoo!)Congrats on getting through months 1-3!

I understand most of your list, but why can't you go in your own back yard? Congrats on being 1/3 of the way there!

I agree that its ligament stretching. But try to get in to see the doc anyway. Once they actually did an unnecessary ultrasound on me to ease my worry -- those are always fun. I also agree with heart beat monitor...except ours was difficult to use so sometimes I couldn't hear anything and got worried for no reason.

I love your posts because they bring back wonderful memories. I'd forgotten how self-absorbed (in a good way) I was w/my body & the baby when I was pregnant!

Hugs! I'm thinking of you.

My guess is that you've already been to the doctor by the time you read this. Did you get a lollipop? Or some mind-ease?

You can't go into your own back yard? What's that for?

ya know...That's not a bad list. Man, I have to get pregnant soon! I wanna list like that! LOL

Hope you got a hold of the doctor and you are feeling better. Congratulations on entering your second trimester! Time goes by so fast- it seems like just a week or so ago we found out you were pregnant. Oh wait, it was a couple of weeks ago! ;-)

I didn't read all your comments (well, because the hubby is about to come home and the kids are eating chocolate chip cookies and watching SpongeBob and I SHOULD be folding laundry) but I had that pain too. Ligaments. Loosening. Weird, but true.

Every single person that I have ever known that has gotten pregnant, including myself, have been CONVINCED beyond any shadow of a doubt that the dates were off. As far as I know, all of us were pretty much dead on actually - but none of us could be convinced of this. I spent the entire pregnancy convinced I was going to go into labor 2 weeks before my given due date, which made those last 2 weeks that I spent waiting to go at any minute absolutely excruciating and long.

When you go for your ultrasound, they'll be able to tell you for sure. Just do yourself a favor, if you're going to insist that they're wrong, make sure that you estimate a date later than the given due date, as to save yourself the agony!

I would guess that you also cannot shovel snow. That is a good thing, and fortunately it's on my list too. Not because I'm pregnant, but because I'm a girl and my husband spoils me. Lists like yours are very positive things. :)

Um. hmm, I bet i am rocking the unprofessional cleavage today too.

Hope you're doing OK Beth!

One good thing about leaving us in the dark for SO LONG about it all is that we don't have to wait very long for The Baby - hope everything worked out today. And I'm sure Chris enjoys the unprofessional amount of cleavage.

Hmmm..are you allowed to eat chocolate? My ex husband used to harp at me if I even thought about chocolate. I fixed him. I ate it when I was at work. He suprised me one day and showed up as I was shoving the last bite of a Snickers into my face. It was an ugly scene.

There is nothing more annoying that having someone monitor everything you do, even if they have the best of intentions.

I say the only laundry a pregnant woman is allowed to do is baby clothes.

Because you KNOW you can't trust a man with baby clothes.

Plus, when you are waiting through the LONGEST six months of your life ... baby clothes are all you got.

And if you're real lucky, you'll get your hubby in the habit of changing the kitty litter and he won't think to have you take your turn after so many months.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for ya'!


My site is gone, but I'm still here! Just didn't want you to freak. I will continue to read and post comments on my favorite sites.

Man -- after reading that list - * I * want to be pregnant! :-)

Hang in there -- you're doing fine...

With my first child my husband wouldn't let me put gas in my own car. He'd take out the trash - and if I needed anything, he was right there. He wised up by the time I was pregnant with my second child. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Other mommies have posted this information already, but when I was at your stage, I wanted to hear it over and over again....

The worrying is definitely part of it. I remember telling my friends that I was certain something was wrong. I had no physical evidence, but I was convinced that my baby story would have an uphappy ending. My friends weren't mommies yet and didn't know to tell me that I was experiencing the normal anxiety. I went on to have a perfect pregnancy and a perfect baby. Now, like the other mommies, I stand in his doorway and watch his belly go up and down, just to be assured he's still breathing. So, all this to say, you're just fine. But no amount of words will make the worry go away.

wow, that list is almost reason enough to get knocked up!
Hope you're doing well

I'm sure worrying is a natural part of being pregnant. Once I finally get pregnant, I'll probably worry non-stop for the entire time.

So, how long did you hold out before calling?


I don't think I outgrew that panic until my oldest was a year and a half old and fell and bumped her head for the first time. (I had left her in the care of her godmother, who felt HORRIBLE that she was the first to allow that to happen).

By my third, I was scrubbing the walls during my *nesting* phase. (With non-toxic Mean Green, of course)

I think at some point I decided I wanted to enjoy pregnancy a little and not sit in a chair for fear of breaking one of the oh-so-many contradicting rules that the doctors all give.

Anyhow, I babble. The whole reason I was responding was I wanted to let you in on what caused MY intense abdominal pain in early pregnancy. I was small. Very small. You look pretty small. There are ligaments in the lower belly that are so rarely used that when they start stretching for pregnancy, it really DOES feel like "OHMYGODSOMETHINGISWRONG"....Much like I imagine a bursting appendix would feel.

That might be it. I hope that gives you some comfort.


Kudos on reaching the second trimester, Beth! Not long now. Btw, it's not a good idea to handle kitty litter right now. As you probably know, there are certain microbes to which you don't want to play host.

Heh..I remember the cleavage issue too! Funny thing is, my boobs never went away. I'm still stuck with them seven years after my last pregnancy.
Don't worry about the will ease up when you start being sick of being pregnant. Then instead of worrying you'll just feel fat and pissed off. My thing wasn't worrying - I was constantly bombarded with memories, specifically from my own childhood. I marvel at how I used to function at work and, at the same time, be reliving the constant memories. It was bizarre.
Beth, you'll be fine and you'll have a totally beautiful child and good lord, I can't believe how quickly this pregnancy is moving along. Second trimester already!!

Now me, I'm a natural worrier (I make my honey wake me up to say goodbye every morning no matter what time he leaves, sometimes 4am, because "what if something happens and we never got to say goodbye". Yeah, I'm a freak). So I can relate to what you're saying. I hope you were able to put your mind at ease, either with or without seeing the Dr.
Now, for the love of all that is good...would ya post so I can stop worrying too?
Thanks Beth.

Cleavage is good. Also I had terrible cramps throughout all pregnancies, hindsight tells me, I worried and stressed to no end - chill and enjoy the journey. All will be fine.

Uh oh - I'm in trouble - not picking things up that weigh more than 15 lbs? I do 40lb lunges 3 times a week... What about the 3 miles/day that I run? And cleaning? Tee hee if I had to wait for my husband to do that I'd be waiting until cows jumped over the moon. Take it easy and don't worry - everything is going to be fine. Those pains? I keep telling myself that it's the ligaments that support my uterus stretching, I know TMI :)

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