so the fish said...
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Miss March

Patricia suggested it, and Autumn provided the honest to goodness questions, so here we go.

My bio in the format of a Playboy Playmate of the Month.

Name: Beth Fish
Bust, Waist, Hip: None to speak of, round as a beachball, when they say "hip" they really mean "ass," I have a smokin' ass.
Height, Weight: 5'6" and pregnant so no way in hell
Birthdate, Birthplace: 11/14/74 Los Angeles, CA
Ambitions: To not kill my unborn child by sleeping the wrong way, to insure that my cat Callie is immortal because I could not deal otherwise, and to someday find a job that challenges more than my patience. Oh, and world peace.
Turn-ons: Clive Owen, someone rubbing my head, my husband telling me I look nice (which he should do much more of, hint hint), and anything to do with the side of my neck which usually causes me to fall down, in a good way.
Turn-offs: Men who yell at you on the street (does that ever work?), parsnips, not being able to drink for 9 months (ok, 8 months), and pants that are either four inches too long of half an inch too short for my legs.
You can win me over with: Oatmeal cookies and humor.
My idea of fun: Going out. Anywhere. I just like to go out.
Favorite movie: The Princess Bride
Some random personalized question: The best random personalized question for me would be "Why are you such a bitch?" The answer is "Because I can be and you know you love it so bite me."

Come on now, you know you all want to do it.

Comments (12)

But the real question is, what part of your body is the staple covering up?

This is the best thing I've read all day. Now you just have to wait for your lonely male readers to come out of the woodwork and demand a centerfold.

"I feel happy when" - that's the weird one. I'm adding it into mine. :) (and, the link to my site doesn't work...)

I can't track back, but here's the link:

so, if you married Clive Owen and he rubbed your head, told you that you looked nice and then maybe brushed his lips on the side of your neck... i'm guessing your head would explode. in a good way.

That was a great entry. Also extremely happy that you love The Princess Bride. Wonderful, wonderful movie. I think my favorite line is either "Inconceivable!" or "'No more rhymes now, and I mean it.'...'Anybody want a peanut?'"

Heh, heh. The Princess Bride. "As you wish." Yes, we know why Beth likes that movie. :)

And I just realized you are younger than my baby sister who is also pregnant. Egads. How the heck did I get so old?

Isn't it time for you to get a new pretend celebrity boyfriend? Clive Owen is so last week.

Beth is a centerfold... Loved reading your answers Miss March!

that was hilarious I am going to put that in mine :) thanks for the great idea....

Oh my God! How in love with Cary Elwes was I when I saw The Princess Bride? I think I may still love him. Yummy! Who has a name like Buttercup, anyway? That stupid ho doesn't deserve him.

Love this idea and may have to steal it for myself. Great answers!

Yep. That's cool. I'm gonna do it!

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So the Fish Said...

Whoever you are, now I place my hand upon you, that you be my poem, I whisper with my lips close to your ear.

- Walt Whitman

Meet the Fish

I want to get a pet duck and keep it in the bathtub.
I am addicted to chap stick and altoids.
I am freakishly flexible.

World's Most Beautiful Child


World's Most Handsome Child


Other Important Things

Clive Owen

Clive Owen
Pretend Celebrity Boyfriend

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