April first! Today is April first! Take that March, you bitch, you languorous old cow, you dilatory wench. I hated you from the beginning. I was totally over you two weeks ago, but you couldn't take a hint. Oh no, you had to stick around and rub it in, lord it over me in your annoying little singsong voice "March, March, it's still March." Well April first has vanquished your languid ass and I will have no more of you for a full eleven months.
Would you all please promise me that April is going to be better than March? Please? I don't mind if you lie. Also, I think you all should send me tulips and daffodils because they are my favorites and it would make me happy and naturally, it is all about me. You can just send them to my office, I'll be here until 5.