The last 16 days have thrown my life into complete chaos - the kind of chaos I cannot believe I ever lived without. These are the things I want to remember from the first days of your life.
You are unclear on the concept of hands and most often use yours to smack yourself in the face. When you were four days old, you accidentally discovered that your fingers fit up your nose. You were not at all happy with the discovery. You seem most content when breastfeeding with both of your hands pressed against your cheeks.
You have long dark hairs on your earlobes and ankles and most of your forehead. These will go away eventually, but I will miss the little hairs on your ears. You have an amazing amount of dark brown hair. It was the first thing I noticed the first time I saw you, and the first thing that made you seem like a real person to me.
You have small red birthmarks in the divot of your upper lip, the right side of your nose, and right between your eyebrows. Your nose and bottom lip are squished to one side from being stuck up under my ribs for so long. They are straightening out, but when you are sleeping I can tell when you are really out because your bottom lip flops way over to the side.
You are using your legs a lot more in the last week and are more willing to let us touch and move them. For the first week or so, you kept them scrunched at the knee and splayed at the hip and screamed if anyone tried to move them.
You only cry when you are hungry. Sometimes, your father and I are stupid and try to figure out another reason why you are crying. There is never another reason. Even if you just finished an hour-long meal, if you are crying, you are hungry. You seem to prefer dirty diapers to clean ones and solve any gas problems on your own by spitting up huge amounts of milk and then crying for more.
When you eat, you like to pretend that you are asleep until you get close enough to make a huge grunting noise and dive bomb the breast so you can latch on with your mouth open as little as possible. When I pull you off to try again or try to open your mouth a little wider, you look at me like you can't believe the cheek that would cause me to try such a thing. You tend to zone out while eating, and when I move you to burp you there is often a stream of milk running down your cheek that you are just too sleepy to swallow.
You don't flinch when I put your entire foot in my mouth, or when I give you Eskimo kisses or when I accidentally poke you in the eye. You like to have your head rubbed, the same way I rubbed it all those times before you were born. The skin of your belly is the softest thing I have ever felt in my life.
You are so beautiful that every time I look at you it is all I can do not to burst into tears.
Mama loves you, Mia. Never have any doubt.