so the fish said...
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You ask, I answer. Eventually.

Ok, I know I told you all to ask me questions, but did you have to ask so many questions? I mean come on, I have an infant to schlep around 16 hours a day here. Anyway, here's the first round and I'll keep working on the rest.

Emily asked:

How did you determine the URL, "So The Fish Said"?
It's the set up to an inside joke from college. Want the punchline? I'll get to that in response to a later question. However, the punchline won't help much or even make sense, which is the real beauty of an inside joke.

Why do you want a duck for the bathtub?
I like ducks, what with the feathery cuteness and wiggly butts and endearing little quacking sounds, and if you are going to have a pet duck the logical place to keep it is in the bathtub.

How did you decide to paint the upstairs bathroom green and opt for non-pink tones for Mia's room?
We went with non-pink for Mia's room as a meaningless rebellion against gender stereotypes and also I don't care all that much for pink. We painted the bathroom green because we had it left over from Mia's room.

Ava asked:

How did you manage to stay so thin during your whole pregnancy?
I gained 34 pounds, which doesn't seem so thin to me now that I have to lose it. I do think I carried it rather well though, if I do say so myself. Partly I was lucky in that almost all of the weight was in my belly and I never had problems with the swelling that so many women suffer. Also though, I worked really hard at it. I was in good shape when I got pregnant and went to the gym 4 times a week nearly every week for the entire pregnancy.

Did you quit your job already?

Do you plan on getting a job later on?
Yes, but I don't know when. My goal right now is to be home or work very part-time for the first year, but we are only 7 weeks into this so the plans may change.

Sari asked:

Why do you blog?
The honest answer? Probably because my husband does and I don't like to be left out.

How do you decide what's too personal to write about?
Well, first off I don't write about my marriage. (I do write about my husband, but that's not the same thing.) I would never discuss the details of my marriage with anyone without Chris's expess permission and I think to do so would be a betrayal of his trust. One of the things I promised was to honor him, and in my mind keeping his confidence is a large part of that.

Second, I don't write about things that hurt me because, well, they hurt me so why air them publicly? I have what I think of as the attention-whore test. A lot of people do write all the intimate and painful details of their lives, and some of them I read and think "wow, this person really has something to say and is so brave to say it." Other times, I read stuff like that and think "wow, what an attention-whore drama queen." If I am ever inspired to write about something serious, I ask myself whether I will be the first type or the second type. So far, the answer is always that I would be the second type, so I don't do it.

Vanilla or chocolate?

Michele asked:

We all know, in one way or other, that having a baby will turn our lives upside down, but what change has surprised you the most?
The puke. I was totally unprepared for all the puke.

How did Chris propose to you? (or did you propose to him?)
Chris proposed to me (although honestly I think I pretty much told him it was time for him to get around to it already - I'm so bossy) by hanging the ring on our Christmas tree and sending me over to look for the new "ornament" he had gotten us.

What's your favorite candy bar?
Snickers. King sized.

~L asked:

Are you still recovering from the surgery? I mean, I had my wisdom teeth out a month ago and sometimes my mouth is still weird. I can't imagine major abdominal surgery.
Nope, I feel great and have pretty much since about a week after the surgery. In fact, for several weeks I had to keep reminding myself that I had just had abdominal surgery so I didn't accidentally go jogging or something. Now, it did hurt, especially getting into and out of bed and when Mia kicked me in my incision (which she does about 83 times a day) but overall it wasn't bad and I was off painkillers by the time I left the hospital. I know this is not a typical result, but I'm not complaining.

Have you ever thought about living outside of the D.C. area? If so, where?
Every once in a while we talk about moving to somewhere with a lower cost of living, but can never agree on where we might go. I have to be on a coast and am biased against the South (for no good reason) so the only places I would really consider would be New England (too expensive and cold), California (too much family), or the Pacific Northwest (too much rain). I really like this area, other than the cost of housing, so unless one of us gets a dream job (in, say, Paris) I think we are staying here.

What is your favorite creative thing to do? Writing, photography, etc.?
Funny question. I used to be all about the creative endeavors - acting, singing, dancing, writing (bad) poetry, but for the last several years I have done very little of any of that. I took up knitting last year and enjoy that, but don't know when I will have time to pick it up again.

lizabetty asked:

Do you plan to have anymore babies?
Maybe. Probably. Yes. Maybe. I have always wanted two or three kids, Chris would be happy to have one. Years ago, we hypothetically decided on two theoretical children, but we are going to see how the first one goes before we jump in for another round. That said, I loved being pregnant and think I would be very sad not to do it again. Not that it's a reason to have another kid, but it is what it is.

Whats your favorite "date" thing to do...ya know, keepin the romance alive stuff.
Let's see.... dinner at our favorite Indian restaurant, home to lie on the couch together, watch a movie and share a pint of Ben and Jerry's. I'm a cheap date.

Name one person who drives you NUTS!!!
There's nobody who can make me as nuts as my husband does sometimes. I'm sure the feeling is mutual.

JuJuBee asked:

How long does it take you (ok...PRE-Mia) to get out the door, from shower to car?
About an hour. I don't move very fast in the morning.

Did you get yourself a new congratulatory purse?
No. I was going to say not yet, but I know I probably won't. I have a very hard time spending money on myself and will probably use the money to buy a bunch of clothes for Mia instead.

Are you as scared as I am to raise a girl into a strong woman?
Terrified. Utterly terrified. Luckily though, Mia comes from a long line of strong, independant, mouthy women, so she will be hard pressed to turn out any other way.

Dawnie asked:

Why when I see the phrase "blog or journal" do I read it as "blournal"? Am I on the brink of creating hip new internet slang and don't even realize it?
Yes, because you are the Dawnie and therefore everything you do suddenly inspires a nationwide trend and also fan clubs.

Do you miss your job? Do you wish you'd left sooner?
No, I don't miss it. In hindsight, I should have left about two years ago, but I have learned a lot and gotten some good experience.

What does Mia think about the cats? Does she have an opinion on them yet?
She hasn't paid much attention to them yet, although I did sit her in a chair next to Callie today and she seemed to like feeling her fur. The cats find Mia rather tedious. And loud.

Starfruit asked:

Describe a sexual encounter with Chris - before and after baby.
Before - when Chris and I started dating in college, he had a loft bed left over from living in the dorm and an apartment with very low ceilings. I couldn't say exactly how much clearance there was between the bed and the ceiling, but it was much less than needed to sit up in bed. It was also much less than needed to not bang your butt on the ceiling. Needless to say, the loft didn't last too long.

After - I'm supposed to have sex after the baby? Are you sure? Give me a break here, the OB only cleared me for "normal activities" on Thursday. I'll get right on that though. For foreplay, I can let Chris wash the sour milk vomit off my breasts.

Do you fear the change in your relationship with Chris (losing that connection) as Mia gets older (school, friends)
I'm sure our relationship will change, but I don't fear it. We've been together since I was 18 and Chris was 20, so our relationship has necessarily changed a lot over the years as we both changed. Sometimes we have managed the change gracefully and sometimes not, but I know this will be just another evolution and even if it is one of the difficult ones we will make it.

Do you fear losing Chris' attention now that you're a 'mom'?

wavybrains asked:

How did you know you were "ready" (are we EVER ready?) to start trying for Miss Mia?
Are we ready? I'm still not sure. I think we just decided to do it, ready or not. Then it took us a year to get pregnant, so we had that time to get more used to the idea (although we still freaked when it actually happened).

Have you always been fit?
Pretty much. The least fit I have ever been was probably in college when I lost a bunch of weight for no good reason and looked like I really needed a sandwich already. Other than during and right after college, I have always been pretty active which helps to keep my butt from resting on the backs of my legs.

How clean is your house usually?
Very, but I deserve none of the credit since all I do is pay the cleaning lady.

Comments (11)

That was fun. And interesting. I like this game. :o)

That was great! So not playing on my blog!

If you should decide to come to California you have my full permission to use me as an excuse to get out of family obligations.

Very informative indeed! The loft story cracked me up. :-)

You have so much patience..I couldn't handle all this! I think you are a great mother and that you are a very happy woman!!

I just love your answers! I'm sorry I missed out on asking questions, maybe next time ;)

Don't tell anyone but here's a little secret about the Pacific Northwest: It only rains in the winter and spring. And once your gills grow in, you barely even notice it!

Seriously though, It rains so little during May, June, July, August and part of September that we actually look forward to a few clouds and sprinkles once September hits.

And King Sized Snickers...mmmmmmmmm Snickers!

Oooh, I wouldn't buy the whole 'grow gills & you won't notic it' bit. I grew up in Northern CA and the rain, oh my the rain. All winter. All spring. So much rain. But if you're a misty moisty kind of person who likes that... then it is incredibly beautiful in the Pacific Northwest...

Now, for one more question: How on EARTH did you find time to answer all those questions with your little one??? I have a seven month old who just figured out how to crawl and my computer time seems to consist of grabbed minutes scattered throughout the day. You rock!

I loved your answers!

Can I borrow your cleaning lady?????? :)

I LOVED this post!!! Thanks--that was fun!

Thank You for anwering those questions! That was a fun post :-) (Well they are all fun to read really).

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So the Fish Said...

Whoever you are, now I place my hand upon you, that you be my poem, I whisper with my lips close to your ear.

- Walt Whitman

Meet the Fish

I want to get a pet duck and keep it in the bathtub.
I am addicted to chap stick and altoids.
I am freakishly flexible.

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