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Not gonna do it. Wouldn't be prudent.

So yeah, I've decided not to say anything to the blogger who dumped me. My reasons for this are threefold:

One - As many of you pointed out, this is only the internet and also it is her loss and additionally it is no skin off my nose. Only that last bit is a lie because everything, everything, is skin off my nose. Potentially I should work on that. Anyway, bah, whatever, I am sad about it but will move on and instead focus on you nice, pretty, very smart people who still like me. Your hair looks really great today, by the way.

Two - I am prideful and hateful and spiteful and therefore do not want to give her the satisfaction of knowing that I care. I guess I've blown it already though if she ever reads my last post, but I still have a (pitiful, granted) form of deniability this way. "You? Ha-ha, you? Oh no, I was talking about one of the other people who suddenly began to despise me for no reason. Why, I barely even noticed when you dropped me like a virulently scum-encrusted hot potato. Did I mention ha-ha? See how I find the humor?"

Three - I tend to be a bit clueless when it comes to all that, you know, interpersonal crap, so it is entirely possible that I did do something awful for which I can never be forgiven and since I am so selfish and all I would rather just feel that I have been deeply wronged. Oh poor me, don't you all feel so sorry for me now and want to send me candy?

Hmmmm.... I think I am not coming across so well in this post, but I promise that other than the bitchiness and the spite and the grudge-holding (oh yeah, and the passive-aggressive stuff) I really am a lovely person. I will offer an example as proof. Yesterday, as a surprise for my husband, I finally got the TiVo we have had for two years hooked up so that it would work the way it was supposed to where you could record something and watch something else, rather than the way we had it hooked up where you could record something and watch, um, what you were recording. And I only made him wander around the house trying to figure out what the surprise was for a couple of hours before I gave in and told him. See? Perfectly lovely of me.

Also, in the interest of rambling on because the baby is actually sleeping and I feel like the world is one great big party just for me, on Tuesday I not only made dinner (by following the very astute advice of you lovely people) I also went to the gym and worked out for nearly 20 minutes! Baby steps, you know. I also braved the scale and found that I only weigh 5 pounds more than I told my OB I weighed before I got pregnant, which means I only weigh 8 pounds more than I really weighed before I got pregnant, which I think means I should have some more ice cream.

Comments (43)

See? you're thin and beautiful and you have the cutest baby, so you shouldn't care what other people think, especially if it's people from the Internet, right?
I was going to say, enjoy the ice cr. , but apparently the word "cr..m" is questionable content for your blog :)

Just stumbled upon your blog and LOVE it. Really I am just cracking up here. Good luck with the whole "being dropped" thing, I just started blogging and until I read your post didn't even know you could be dropped! Oh and cute baby!

yay for weight loss, dinner and Tivo! Really, is that not the perfect life??

I thought I was the only one that did the weight math like that. Although my hair is looking really bad today, but thanks for the compliment anyway :)

8 lbs, wow...you are lucky! dont worry about that silly person anymore :)

If it makes you feel better, I just added you as a blogger to "my favorites" (on my comp. not to my blog yet) and I enjoy you.

And Tivo and weightloss make everything better.

I'm with you on the prideful thing. I got dumped like that too, and while I still wonder why, I will NEVER ask.

Congrats on the fabulous weight loss, dinner cooking and trip to the gym. I believe you do deserve more ice cre@m.

Hi, I'm new around here, just wanted to speak up and say I enjoy your site. Congratulations on your beautiful baby!

Whatever that other person's problem was, it was theirs and obviously too minor for them to ever mention. So let them stew about it and try not to give it another thought.

Oh, and I got this in an email once..."May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day. And may their arms be too short to scratch." :)

Just don't ever complain to the Internets that your size 4 jeans are your fattest fat jeans to ever fat because I might have to punch you :)

dear beth, i am dumping you because you lost all your pregnancy weight and i have pregnancy weight even though i never had a kid! and i'm jealous, so there. ;-P kidding. ::sigh:: i'm hopelessly addicted to this site; i ain't goin' anywhere. in fact, you've motivated me to be skinny again! wooohooo for skinny!

hahaha- I can't stop laughing. Great site you got going here!!
Congrats on the weight loss and being able to make dinner :)

As for the person who dumped you (which like a few others here, I didn't know happened- I wonder if I've been dumped?)- their loss not yours!!

Whew, that is a tough one. I've had my feelings hurt quite a few times by online friends. I've personally never said responded, but I am likely far more clueless then you on the interpersonal realm, so I dare not offer advice here.

All I really intended to say here (ha) is that it's hard for me to imagine anyone ever "dumping" or treating you poorly in any way. You are beauftiful human being, and I will echo others in recognizing that is most definately HER loss.

Why thank you. Your hair is pretty, too, and I must say, your butt is still in fantastic shape.

I have to agree with the others speaking here( ^ there)... You're.. Beautiful, Thin, Smart, and a great mom!!

And thank you, your hair looks loverly as well, heheh

Woooo! Pass that ice cream!

mmm, ice cream. mmmmmmmm.

Damnit, I guess no blogger bashing then? Oh, ok. You are a better person than I. Those last 5 pounds I have to lose are not going anyway anytime soon. Want to share some Dulce de Leche to ease the pain?

Your hair looks great, too. Oh, my gosh, we are SO cute - much cuter than Romi and Michele. ;) Who needs that dumper anyway?
I am super impressed about your weight, or lack thereof. That's the big thing looming ahead of me. Can't decide if I want the weight gain to be Bean's (which would mean giving birth to a huge baby) or mine (which would mean weighing a gazillion pounds after birth). But, as my mom pointed out, it doesn't matter what I decide - what's done is done.
Hope the ice cream was delish.

I've always thought that if you did something so bad as to be unforgivable, that you should be able to figure out what you did.

How was that ice cream? Or did you resist?

You know, I understand where you are coming from on this, I know that when I've been suddenly dumped from a links list or blogroll, part of me is offended or a teeeeeeny bit hurt by it. But in the realm of things, not such a huge deal. Just have to remind myself of that a few (hundred) times. :)

This is so interesting. Last year I (married female) started reading a young woman's blog that lives in the suburbs of my city. I started commenting and we started emailing and became "girlfriends." At her suggestion we decided to get together for dinner. We tried to bring our spouses, but it didn't work out.

We went for a drink and dinner. No big deal. A nice evening between girlfriends - we split the checks.

Later in an email she suggested the four of us go out for her birthday in a few months time. I started making suggestions of some new and cool restaurants - and her emails stopped.

Oh, she'd write but she would ignore all the suggestions about the dinner. After her birthday came and went and I asked one more time (in an email about other stuff as well) and she responded but not about the dinner, I decided I needed to "dump" her.

I sent her an email and explained that since dinner had been her suggestion that I didn't understand the silence but I did understand the snub. I also told her that I'd would stop reading her blog.

What's interesting is twofold: I still think this is an interesting woman that I would have liked to have remained friends with. And while I did stop reading her blog for a long time, I recenting decided to just decided to peep and she has made her blog private. So I guess in reality it was me who was dumped.

I think internet friendships can take on many forms. Some are meant to continue into the real world and some are not. And sometimes they are not even suppose to continue to cyberspace.

Thanks for letting me share my story. What I guess I'm trying to say is, just, well, you're not alone in getting dumped.

This is so interesting. Last year I (married female) started reading a young woman's blog that lives in the suburbs of my city. I started commenting and we started emailing and became "girlfriends." At her suggestion we decided to get together for dinner. We tried to bring our spouses, but it didn't work out.

We went for a drink and dinner. No big deal. A nice evening between girlfriends - we split the checks.

Later in an email she suggested the four of us go out for her birthday in a few months time. I started making suggestions of some new and cool restaurants - and her emails stopped.

Oh, she'd write but she would ignore all the suggestions about the dinner. After her birthday came and went and I asked one more time (in an email about other stuff as well) and she responded but not about the dinner, I decided I needed to "dump" her.

I sent her an email and explained that since dinner had been her suggestion that I didn't understand the silence but I did understand the snub. I also told her that I'd would stop reading her blog.

What's interesting is twofold: I still think this is an interesting woman that I would have liked to have remained friends with. And while I did stop reading her blog for a long time, I recenting decided to just decided to peep and she has made her blog private. So I guess in reality it was me who was dumped.

I think internet friendships can take on many forms. Some are meant to continue into the real world and some are not. And sometimes they are not even suppose to continue to cyberspace.

Thanks for letting me share my story. What I guess I'm trying to say is, just, well, you're not alone in getting dumped.

Well, I've been lurking around here for a few months now (thanks for all the smiles and giggles, btw :o)), and I finally felt I had to comment....

Have you considered that MAYbe your blog is way, WAY better than the dumper's...maybe the dumper just felt plain inferior! ;o)

Would it make you feel better if I told you I moved you from my Blogroll list to my permanent list?

Ice Cream! YES!

Beth, you are doing really well :) Small victories, right?

Thank you for telling me my hair looks good today. I was having major self-esteem issues about it, but somehow you knew just how to make me feel better!

I have alot of internet love for ya. If that helps.

Woman, you so rock, and I'm insanely jealous that you've gotten your bod back its pre-preggo weight this fast. Now if you find the cure for stretch marks I may have to have declared a true goddess. I hear the tax benefits are so good you won't even need a job.

You know, like many, I never considered the personal politics of the blog list. In fact, I think half the links on my page are dead. In fact, I don't even remember who's on my list... maybe I should go look and if you'd like a link just let me know. I never actually picture anyone actually reading my blog. Odd no?

Wow! You know how to hook up electronics? Chris is a lucky man. I don't think I could have hooked up the TiVo if my life depended on it.

I too have been dumped on occasion by a blogger... it is disappointing. I guess some people just narrow down their links to the bloggers they like the most and we didn't make the cut. I actually have decided to limit my links to 40 because I find it hard to keep up with reading more than that. So I guess I can't complain.

Congrats on the wieght loss! I may have found it. Can I send it back?

You skinny bitch...I'm so taking you off my blog list now!

Just kidding!

Good for you and your smokin' ass!

wow, i go away for a few days and i miss all the drama.

seriously, who would dump you?

and yes, you can definately have the ice cream...you of the flat stomach and the adorable baby. i'm mighty jealous right now...

Hey, hi... lok at it that way:
YOU JUST GOT A NEW ONE.
... SO the world keeps on turning, you might as well dance and sing

nice to meet you

oops .. spelling is not one of my highlights... clarol has a grip on that one...

catchy title for the post, beth--i miss dana carvey on snl. kudos on the weight loss, gym, dinner, and Tivo hook-up. you rock! dumped? you? who cares? your hair looks way cool :)

ya for Ice Cream, seriously Beth, that's pretty impressive!

Have a good weekend!

That happened to me. It was actually a blogger that I'd been intoduced to through my cousin. I thought I'd written witty things and not outrageous or anything, and then the next thing I knew my IP was banned at her sight. I never found out why.

You definitely made me smile today. But that's usually the case. Have fun watching (and recording) TiVo and also eating lots of ice cream!

My head hurts a little from trying to do the weight math at the end, but it sounds good, so way to go!

And yes, yes, focus on us! We are awesome and will never ever leave you. :)

You were still adorable when you were pregnant and much heavier, not need to worry about 8 pounds. You can't hide adorable behind a bathroom scale.

Well, think of it this way, you got yourself a new reader. I just started reading your blog on your Oct4 post. So it all balances out...you have no loss. :)

Hi Beth,

Is being dumped when they take you off their list of blogs and ignore your comments and stop visiting? Just curious what it all entails.

We all repeat our usual social patterns in any of our social settings, whether it's friends, bloggers, coworkers, what have you (I'm actually posting on this at some point). It's interesting what comes out.

At this point you have some options:

- You can find out what the reasons were and get honest answers to the puzzle in order to take the info and discern what is real, what is skewed, and what will always be a difference of opinion.

- You can just give it up and continue to do the very best that you can, and feel good about being the best wife, mother, friend, daughter, etc. etc. that you can be.

- You can ask some other friends or hubby, with whom you are very close, what their thoughts are about your interpersonal relations in general.

We grow the most when we get a mirror in our faces. But if the mirror is warped by the person holding it, then it isn't going to be as helpful.

I'll tell you that I have always enjoyed coming to your site, when time permits, and I know I don't come all the time, but I do think you are a genuinely awesome gal with an awesome life and a great heart. Best wishes, Beth.

I came here to see what the outcome was--and I see you did excatly what I would do. But I did recieve a nice letter from a friend who'd read this post and wondered if it was her I was talking about. You know it made me feel loved for a brief moment, because she cared enough to ask.

I care way too much what others think. I'm glad to know I'm not alone.

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So the Fish Said...

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