If anyone ever wants to torture me for information, you should know that my breaking point for sleep deprivation is one week. (However, I will tell you whatever you want to know in exchange for chocolate chip cookies.)
Last Monday, we stopped swaddling Mia at night because she kept waking herself up trying to get her arms free. Since then, I have gotten no more than three hours of sleep a day, and most days much less and in chunks of 20 minutes or so. Mia is still a great sleeper, she just refuses to do it anywhere near her bed and insists on sleeping on or next to me. If she is feeling generous, she allows me to lie in bed while she sleeps, if not she will sleep only if I am entirely upright.
I am not a family bed person. I don't have anything against it, I am just terrified of squishing the baby. I even refused to even hook her co-sleeper to the bed because I worried I would push a pillow on top of her. The inch and a half between her bed and mine made me happy. Over the last week, I have been letting her fall asleep in my bed and then putting her into her bed, only to have to pick her up again within half an hour. I tried to do the same thing last night, but the exhaustion got the better of me and I would wake up utterly surprised to find Mia right next to me. This is not good.
This morning, I educated Mia in the use of power tools by strapping her co-sleeper to the bed. This required taking my bed apart to raise the mattress. Twice. I am hopeful that this will satisfy her insistance on sleeping with me and still let me get some sleep instead of staying awake all night to make sure I don't roll over. If not, I think it is time for Mia to bond with her father.
(I know we are still very lucky and some people go through this for months, but she was sleeping 8 hours straight at four weeks and I got spoiled.)
Now if you will excuse me, I need to go lie on the floor and cry. I promise it is the only logical thing to do.