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Mostly boring stuff - feel free to skip.

I am well aware that I am a whiny, spoiled, ungrateful bitch and have admitted as much on this site on more than one occasion. There is no need for you to trouble yourself to remind me.

You know how some people are really laid-back and open-minded and let you say basically anything you want in their comments? I'm not one of them. If you are rude or hateful I will delete your comment. If you merely hint that my daughter is not fabulously beautiful, astoundingly brilliant, and terribly advanced for her age, I will delete your comment and ban your ass faster than you can say "gosh, touchy much?". If you link to a commercial website I will delete your comment. If you want to advertise on my site, pay me.

Speaking of ads, what do you guys think of them? I considered having ads when I first quit my job and decided against it, but am now reconsidering. I don't really need the money, but since my poor husband is slaving away to support me in the manner to which I have become accustomed, it would be nice to at least be able to pay for my own facials and pedicures. Seriously would like some opinions on this one. Thanks.

Someone recently intimated that I cuss a lot on this site. Do you think I cuss a lot? I mean, sure, there is the occasional post in which every third word is fuck, but other than that?

I recently updated my code so that if you comment and do not leave a url your email address will not be displayed. I know, I know, I am a terrible blogger for not having done this sooner (although there was a bit in there that was supposed to help thwart spammers). You may now rest assured that if you leave a comment with your email, I will be the only one harassing you. As punishment for being such a slacker, you may each flog me with a wet noodle.

Confidential to Gavin: Dude, I was crushed (crushed! I say) to discover you had not left an email address with your comment, as I had already mentally composed a pithy response about how ennui would be far better if it were not so limited. For example, you should be able to say you are "ennuified," or that you were "ennuied," but now you are better. See? Pithy. Put that in your portmanteau and smoke it.

As a prize for reading all that boring stuff and making it this far: Have I told you that Chris and I are having a disagreement as to whether or not I ever had a lesbian experience at summer camp? I mentioned it to him one time and he was not interested in the details, assuming I am sure that such a thing had never happened. However, now he has his doubts (and quite rightfully so). Sadly, once he got around to asking for the skinny, I no longer had any interest in telling him about it. So what do you think? Should I tell him or just let him wonder forever?

Comments (65)

You should totally get ads. I really hate it when people complain about having to look at ads, because they're a really simple, non-invasive way to compensate you for entertaining us. If I had more traffic, I would get ads.

Have I told you lately how fabulously beautiful, astoundingly brilliant, and terribly advanced your daughter is for her age?

heh heh - yeah, I'm kissin' ass.

Seriously cuss away, have ads if you want, tell mean people to f8ck off and do your thing. I enjoy reading you every day.

get ads and, hence, write more often; don't cuss if you don't have to, why should you with such a pretty face?, you learn cussing don't mean squat when you're actually in your 30s like me; don't worry at all about the 'gavins' of the world, why waste your very precious time, honestly?; and for heaven's sake, TELL chris about the lesbian experience because the s-e-x will be so much better that night; and that is all.

Don't tell and make it seem all that much darker and more mysterious.

Ads don't bother me as long as they don't POP! UP! IN! MY! FACE! and block your brilliant prose.

Ads don't bother me as long as they're not popping up all over the place.

Regarding Chris: Torture! Torture! Torture! Nah...just tell him. But put some kind of conditional request on the information, you can't make it too easy.

oh, ads are totally fine, as long as they don't flash and fly and all that crap.

p.s. tell him. but tell him one sentence at a time. to hear the next one, he has to do another task (i.e. backrub, *DIAPER CHANGE*, cook dinner...heheheh).

p.s. girl, you do NOT cuss much. if someone is really offended, they can just click that little 'x'.

shit. that's easy enough, right? ;)

Oh shit. I don't think you fucking cuss enough at all. Those assholes that bitch about shit like that know what they can kiss, right?!

delurking and commenting all in one swell foop.

i wouldn't tell chris personally. this coming from a person who started reading him first, who thinkgs he's pretty fucking cool (and no you don't swear too much - fuck that shit). you gave him an opportunity. he didn't want to know. had had his chance. you could take pity on him eventually, but be nonchalante (sp?) about it for a while. :P

I say go for the ads. You have enough readers to make it worth it. And really, it's no work at all, so even if it brings in just a bit, you aren't out anything.

And you should keep that lesbian experience under your hat until you REALLY want something from him. It's a great thing to barter.

Go for the ads. If you don't like them, you can always take them down.

As for Chris... make him beg.

So I suck for not delurking earlier and I read anyway (the wet noodle is coming my way now) - but I have a not so good excuse. Work blows.

Anyway - Mia is the most beautiful child on the internet. She makes me actually want to have kids (something I never thought I would want) if I ever find the right guy (0-1000 right now).

Also - there's nothing wrong with ads or cussing. I work on a team of six guys and by far have the worst mouth (mine's like a friggin truck driver).

And - tell Chris, but keep him in suspense a bit longer. Do it on your terms. Maybe with a good bottle of wine.


So the fact that I have commented is a good thing for me? :-)
Tell us more about this lesbian experience...

Wait, you mean one can swear "too much"? ;)

I say don't tell Chris. Whatever he imagines in his mind is probably better than what really happened anyway, heh.

In a nutshell (which is SO hard for me, in case you never noticed my 25 line comments) if you can't cuss on your own blog, then I just don't know. It's a non-issue, IMO. Additionally, ads are fine. If you have the traffic, then why the hell not? Very few things in life are free. I say go for it.

Ads are ok. Its your site and that's up to you. But as a reader, ads don't offend me. If there's a way to make a few bucks in an honest way, why not?

Also, Jesus Christ, you don't curse that God damn fucking much. (heehee.) Seriously, that doesn't offend me either. What, just because your a mom, your not allowed anymore?

Its your blog and do and say what you want. I love it and I'll keep reading. And yes, Mia is beautiful, charming and very intelligent.

oh and tell Chris the story! But save it for a night when you're horney and he's too tired. :-)

I totally don't think you cuss a lot. I've read other blogs with MUCH more cussing. I personally wish I could cuss more on my blog, so I resort to posting stories about my 4 year old cussing.

Ads are good, I think. I'm thinking of going that route myself. Haven't gotten around to it yet.

Don't tell Chris the story. Imagination is so much better than reality. Are you going to tell us the story, though?

Ordinarily, I'd go with the let him stew option, but after the bitch-slap we all gave him over being a sleep-faker, he might need a little cheering up!

I think ads are ugly, and distracting, but other than the asthetic I have no objection.

You certainly don't swear more than the average blogger.

Emily's Opinions:

I think the ads make everything look tacky. I rarely read blogs with ads b/c of their ugliness. And because I like your blog, I'd prefer that you didn't use ads. Oh, wait. This isn't about me?

Do you have any "talents"? Could you list your name on a board at a craft store as a fantastic sewer and sew for other people? I'd think you could make more money, at least, if you did that, as opposed to ads. My $0.02.

I don't think you cuss alot. Although, some people might take things like, "Put that in your portmanteau and smoke it" as harsh and therefore classify it as cussing? I don't know.

As for Chris? He didn't wake up and help with the baby - he pretended to be asleep!! Let him suffer! :P

Do you cuss? Seriously? Never noticed. As for if you should cut it out? NEVER. My one resolution this year is to cuss MORE on my blog. Really. Read my blog. It's right there.

As for the story... make him beg, suffer or barter it. Just don't give it to him for free. But for the love of all that is sex - tell him the story.

I have no problem with Ads. Use the money to pamper yourself or Mia's college fund or to play the lottery or better yet take me to lunch! Swear too much?? What the fuck? Heck with sharing the lesbian experience with Chris, share it with your readers! We're perverts like that, you know.

I agree, ads are fine with me. If I had more traffic, I would get them. However, I think Dooce may have overdone it a bit with her ads - but I'm still reading her site. More power to you if you can use your website to keep you in facials and pedicures. And Mia? Is absolutely scrumptious.

I say go ahead with ads, as long as they are not obnoxious, in-your-face kinds.

Don't tell Chris. He had his chance to find out, and he let it go. Torture him.

Anyone who thinks Mia is not the most beautiful, smart, wonderful baby on the planet is just delusional.

You got nothing to lose with puuting ad ont he site. Every little bit helps.

let him wonder forever! And no, you definetly do not cuss a lot on your site. And it doesnt matter anyhow. I often say darn instead of damn on my site and I feel like I am not being true to myself...

Those adsense ads aren't too bad, I just never click them. I've thought about doing it myself since I stay home too. On cussing, ass seems to be a fave word on my blog along with shit but it's better we get our cussing out by typing it then saying it and having our kids turn into profanity parrots, hence my 2 yr old saying "I don't give a fuck."

I agree with the others and would use the lesbian experience talk for a nice romp in bed. Just watch out, ya may just end up pregnant again. ;)

feel free to get long as there wont be pop ups involved...but still thats your choice...
About the lesb gotta tell the internet first and then we will decide whether you should tell him the details or not... ;) (kidding)
Have fun...

Love the cussing! Go for the ads!

When Dooce introduced more ads, some of her readers went crazy, and I don't understand why. Published authors have to go through editors and produce a manuscript that meets his/her approval. Web sites can become popular and generate income without having to compromise your writing. Hooray for the Internet!

I don't think ads are that bad. I'm perfectly capable of ignoring them, and I certainly don't begrudge you the money! ;)

I don't think you cuss to much. Hell, I think I cuss too little.

Ads? Go for it if you want them, if not, then don't. Every girl deserves to pay for her own pedicures.

I say go for the ads and then go for the mani and pedi.

Love the site by the way! :o)

Let him wonder. Curiosity is good for the soul.

Ads- Sure.
Cuss- Why not?
Telling Chris juicy details- Only at moments when he zones out while you're speaking.. or is my husband the only one who does this?

i am all for ads, to be honest. i think it's a great way to make money doing what you love and they're really not difficult to get used to.

and i say tell him only if he admits that you were totally right about the diaper shirking :P

You should let Chris wonder forever. I don't see anything wrong with ads, as long as they're not obnoxious and in-your-face.

And what the fuck do they mean, you curse too damn much?

I say, it's your blog, your personal web-space, you can say whatever the heck you want to. As for the Ads... go for it, it doesn't distract too much, and they're just "there". And the summer camp... depends on what you want. You can just torture him and let him wonder, or flat out tell him... I'm more of the type to play cat and mouse and hang that sucker over his head for a while, before telling him. Cruel? yes... Fun? Heck yes!!

Ads....absolutely why not? you have so many hits a day that it would be to your benefit :)

Cussing..keep that shit up :)

Lesbian experience...just tell him, he's probably dying to know (which might be a good reason to hold out) but naww just tell him.

fyi your daughter is adorably cute ;)

I think that ads are a great way to bring in the $$. Shoot, you don't really have to do anything besides approve them, right? I say go for it.

As for telling Chris about that one time at summer camp, Nah, let him wonder. Or earn yourself a new purse out of it. Heh...maybe it's just me that's that shallow.

If someone doesn't like it they can fuck off. Oh and clearly, profanity offends me. ;)

Have I mentioned lately that your daughter is fabulously beautiful, astoundingly brilliant, and terribly advanced for her age? Because clearly she is.

Here endith the sucking up.

Seriously, do whatever works for you. This is your blog and you should be able to say/do whatever makes you happy. I'm ruthless with evil commenters as well and fully support your right to delete and/or ban their sorry ass.

I'm not going to take sides on the camp lesbian issue. but if you're gonna share, timing is of the essence. Share only when it'll get you something good!

Go for the ads. I can ignore your ads as much as I ignore others. It if brings you cash, it's your call.

& your baby is delightfully beautiful to behold!

Don't tell him about it...tell US!!

I guess I'm gonna echo what another commenter wrote with respect to ads and cussing = It's YOUR blog. If you want to do a 556 word posting using solely the word FUCK...that's cool with me! Again, your blog. If I get tired of the word fuck, I'll move on.

I don't really *like* ads, but I think they are a kinda neat idea and can totally understand why someone would put them on their site. I'Ve often wondered how they work though...especially if most people (who I assume are like me) don't actually click on the ad. Does the company pay you regardless of how many (or few) times someone actually clicks on the ad? Just wondering!

Anyway, have a good day Beth and Mia-Bean (since she's likely not far)

Ah, don't tell. Somethings are better left unsaid!

Eh, you're kid's just okay. ;-P

Of course your daughter is fabulous! Half the lurkers are here for her pictures (no offense to you, of course).

Go for the ads! Facials, college, surprise gifts for the hubby... definately go for the ads! I do agree with the others about no pop-ups. There isn't too much that's more annoying than a pop up ad.

Cuss all you want! (when blogging goes whole hog mainstream, you may not be able to)

Sure, tell him about the lesbian encounter... when the moment is right.

Ads are fine, and make him wonder about it forever.

OMG I found you! Two weeks ago when I came back to the blogging world I couldn't find your site. I kept getting an error. Decided to try again today and viola here you are!!! YAY ME!

BTW I use to be SwtGAHunnyB from Hunny Hive, like you'd ever remember! LOL

Personally, I don't have a problem with a few ads. Why not make some extra cash off of your huge following?

And I would never have thought you curse a lot. Either way, it's your blog and you can say fuck if you want to.

And anyone that said your baby wasn't beautiful is blind and has a heart made of tar ;-)

If you have ads, I promise to click on them. And get you some money honey.

I;ve been thinking about the ads too...however, if you don't need the money..then don't worry about it. As for rude commenters, they're just jealous!

Personally I think it is the prerogative of the author/blogger whether or not to get ads and so long as the ads are unobtrusive then no harm, no foul. Most of my favorite sites have them and I just zoom past the ads -undistracted and without holding a grudge.

Basically is art ever truly non-commercial? I really don't think so. Would your site be somehow more noble and pure sans advertising? No. I don't get it that somehow having ads would taint the work or the spirit of the work. Blah blah blah. Getting off podium.

i like swear words, so keep em coming!!!

Go for the ads. They're not as annoying as most people make them out to be. And seriously, there is nothing wrong with a cussing post every now and then, and maybe a little more if it is one of those weeks. I do not think you cuss extensively or even on a regular basis. There are even those occasions, "gasp", when cussing makes it that much more entertaining... I just wanted to say good work thus far! Keep it up!

Fuck yeah, you cuss too much. I'm offended as hell. Can you cut that shit out?

And make him squirm on the girl-on-girl stuff... (heh heh heh... evil laugh)

LOL, I'd leave him wonder for a while! :)

Ads on the side bar don't bother me... ads actually in the post bug the shit out of me. Cuss? You cuss? Well if you do, keep doing it, you seem to have the secret blogging receipe that makes you one of my favorite reads. And Mia? She's as cute/advanced/beautiful/etc. as my kids!!

Apologies, O eloquent one, the email's been posted this time. It was a bit of a shock to see "Confidential to Gavin:" right up there after making just one comment. I thought when I wrote my de-lurking post, "there is no way she's even going to notice me for like two months". But lo and behold: she's a reader! Kudos for being probably one of the three people in the entire internets who read comments past the first two dozen or so. =)

Hmm, pithy. Consider it smoked! Another wonderful syntactic snack (Disclaimer: "syntatic" may or may not be a real word, but it does go well beside "snack"). I've seen it around before, but I never really had the urge (or forgot) to boot up and run it by.

Jessica and I are friends, by the way. I got her addicted to your blog the same day I discovered it, and she's probably been following it a good deal closer than I. Hi Jess!

As for ads, put some up if you like; I prefer ones that just sit at the top of the page, not ones that go in the middle of stuff or pop up in windows and junk. Those make me want to cause property damage, which is bad, because I'm currently sitting in front of a rather expensive piece of property that belongs to me.

As for the cussin', well, you might as well do it in text form instead of having Mia give you a very big surprise when she says her first word. If it feels good, give it hell, I say!

P.S. Mia is adorable. Mia is a god among babies. If anyone tells you different, they CLEARLY have had their eyes gouged out. If not, and judging by your response, they are probably well on the way to having them gouged out. ;)

Wow, I've really been sitting here a long time yapping instead of doing stuff like... sleep, or something. Congratulations, you've awoken the loquacious beast within. Good night!

As long as they are not pop-ups, get ads.

I don't understand why people make such a big deal about ads on websites. You don't have to look at them if you don't want to, it's not like you're forced to click on a link - so who cares? I say do it. And to hell with anyone who tells you it's "tacky" like they so nicely told me when I mentioned that I was thinking of doing the same thing.

Also, something needs to be done about people who leave comments that aren't filled with oodles of praise for us and our families. What the hell is wrong with these people anyway? And I only mildly kid here.

Oh, and the cursing bit, I like the cursing. I think it makes personal websites more real when the people curse rather than saying GOSH DARNIT! I don't think you curse too much. I, on the other hand, need my website sprayed down with bleach in order to clean up all the cursing I do. But, whatever. If people don't like it, feel free to move along.

As long as they are not popup ads, I'm cool with it. They way you are boiling the hell out of the pacifiers, you are going to need more money.

Mean people should have more done to them than deletion, but I'm not the law. Yet.

Give Chris a little snippet here and there. Just a tease. That would be fun.

So I am allowed to delete comments I don't like on my own blog? I wasn't sure about that one.

And about the story for Chris. Let him suffer.

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So the Fish Said...

Whoever you are, now I place my hand upon you, that you be my poem, I whisper with my lips close to your ear.

- Walt Whitman

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I want to get a pet duck and keep it in the bathtub.
I am addicted to chap stick and altoids.
I am freakishly flexible.

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