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Personal growth, or some shit like that

Be proud of me. This afternoon, Mia and I went to a playgroup and neither of us cried. This was a playgroup full of people I don't know, and the thing about people I don't know is that I hate them. Seriously. Hate. Of the people I already know, I can't think of a single one of them I actively dislike. (Oh, wait. Thought of one. But if you knew the story you would agree my enmity is justified.) It's just that strangers upset me. I can't ever think of anything to say that isn't idiotic, so I either make a fool of myself or never open my mouth. I hate the people I don't know for making me feel that way - see how it works?

However! I have made A Discovery! When you have a baby, you can talk about the baby! And you can ask about their baby! And you can ask how their pregnancy/delivery/potty training went and most people will get so into it they won't even notice you haven't uttered a word in 20 minutes. And you can use that time to scarf all the cream puffs. We're going to another one on Friday in hopes of more cream puffs.

Anyway, the people were nice, the children were cute, I survived and Mia was so thrilled her little butt was shaking the entire time we were there. She loves kids, especially ones who can walk. I've realized though that finding kids her own age for her to play should not be my goal. I need kids a couple months older than her because most kids her age are half as alert as she is and it just doesn't do it for her.

Finally, if there is anyone among you who does not read my husband you should because he is a lot funnier than I am, but you should also check out the pictures he posted of Mia the other day, because honest to god she is so beautiful they made me cry.

Comments (40)

can i hire him to come and take pictures of isabella??!!!

Beth, she's stunning. absolutely stunning.

Good for you!

And I agree, play date snacks are awesome. Unless all they offer you is rice cakes for which they should be shunned and ostracized for all eternity.

I'm so glad it worked out well! Today, your husband sent me an email (that should've gone to you) about how he hoped the playdate went well, so I had advanced notice.

Congrats on surviving the play group! Of course, cream puffs make everything worthwhile!

The pics are fantabulous!

Yea for you! See, now you are a member of the Mommy Club, and as such no mother with children is a total stranger to you. Membership has its privileges.

So proud of you both! Glad to hear it went well. The pictures are beeeaaauuuuutiful!

Yay for both of you not crying..."or some shit like that" :)

Playdates and Mom groups scare my wife for the same reason's you listed. They do not scare me as much because I know I am an idiot.

Gorgeous photos! She is absolutely scrumptious. I'm a hermit because I hate people I don't know. But now that I have a 2+ month old, I guess I'm going to have to stop being so much of a hermit. For her sake only. She'd better appreciate it. ;)

Yay for you, Beth! I'm very proud FOR you. And yes, I think babies are the great equalizer. I'm glad you and Mia had a really good time - booty shaking and all!

ugh, i hated playdates... of course that was mainly because Cam was in his biting stage and he was trying to take bites of all the other kids as i was trying to take bites of all the various breads and muffins.

i think it's good to align yourself with people who have kids just a little older than your own... it gives yours the motivation to excel.

and Mia, she is just gorgeous... i totally want to eat her up.

well, yeah, Chris is funny and the pictures of Mia are slammin'....but we like you.
I like your take on the first year of motherhood. I like your chapstick addiction and 12 step program to not give your addiction up. I like the fact that you dress your baby up cute just so you won't consider throwing her out with the bath water....

Congrats on joining the play group and the cream puffs. Priorities, baby, priorities.

You know it's bad to hang out with other mothers whose kids are not as bright as Mia. They'll just resent her brilliance and beauty!!!

Yes she is, and she looks so much like you!!

Congratulations! Cream puffs are an awesome anxiety reliever. I could use some of those....

Way to go!
I am not very good with strangers myself. I don't dislike them at first meeting, but I don't really know what to say either making for an awkward situation.
I am sure this is going to be me in a few months.

Mmmm...cream puffs. And I love the fact that Mia was so excited she was shaking her butt the whole time there!

1. Yes, those pictures of Mia are fabulous. Her arms are like heavenly pillows on which I'd like to nibble. :)

2. You and I are alike in our dislike of strangers. I am a decidedly unsocial person (I hesitate to use antisocial because that seems so high school angst to me) and do not like being thrust into a crowd of people I don't know. I'm under the impression that most of the people I encounter, save a small handful, are complete boneheads. And it's not like they've done anything to convince me otherwise. I'm also afraid of making a fool of myself or that everyone will find out that I'm a bitter, cynical writer who wants to stab everyone through the head with her shoe.


Hurray for cream puffs!

i know i already commented but i had a couple other thoughts...
a good playgroup is one where you don't need to shower before you go, as long as your clothes smell okay, they accept you.

a good playgroup is one where the host says to you "i'm opening a bottle of wine once everyone leaves, want to stay?"

I too once feared the playgroups. Now I live at the damn things. See the strangers... not so strange anymore. And they allow me to bitch about stuff, so hey, it's a win win.

Seriously, it gets easier. And Mia will have a blast!

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Cream Puffs. Damn you for making me think about cream puffs!

Also, I hate all people that I don't know either. But I just figured out that the people I know actually rock. So, that's cool. I guess they were strangers at some point, but I can't remember.

Also, Mia is so freaking cute, it makes me want to cry. =)


Cream puffs.

I think it's interesting that you hate strangers, yet you have a slew of "strangers" as friends because of this blog! I have read many a comment of people complimenting you, your husband, and your baby. Strangers like you! Nothing to fear at all! And as for not having anything to say and your husband being funnier... not true! You cannot have a blog if you are not interesting and funny! Just remember, most of the world is just like you. And if they don't like you, who cares! You still have a great husband, a great Bean, and a great life!

I've always been too scared to go to playgroups. Strangers do that to me. Once I get talking to people, though, I'm ok. Then I get bored. Smalltalk bores the hell out of me. I just want to burst out with something personal just to make people get real.
I have to go look at those pics now!

Congratulations! Playgroups will save your life. Forget about what Mia needs, you need one so you have other mothers to talk to (besides us). :)

Right now, all Mia needs is you and children to watch and warm milk. :)

What a doll! Her arms look so yummy. There is such a sweetness in her face--but I just know she's planning something.

That's awesome that you pushed yourself to be around strangers in order for Mia to make new friends. Awesome. I too am not a fan of strangers so I can imagine what that took!

You sound like me. WHen you're pregnant you start talking to people who you normally wouldn't who are in the same boat. And it brings everyone together. UNless they are utter jerks LOL

Way to go! Meeting new people is scary because you're right, most of them suck and I hate em too. But it sounds like you had fun!!!!
I checked out your hubby's page and pictures and she is adorable!!!! I'm going to add your hubby ot my blogroll now.

glad you made it throught the playgroup!! see, not ALL strangers are bad ;)

It takes courage to walk into a room full of strangers. Sometime "liquid courage" but courage none the less. Good for you. Glad you met a bunch of moms and it wasn't as painful as you anticipated. Hope you make some new friends that will be there to celebrate lots of Mia's milestones.

way to go on the playgroup! and the cream puffs.

and i wonder if my butt shakes when i am excited?!

I can relate to this, although it's not so severe -- here's to getting out and meeting some new folks.
Those pictures are so beautiful! Her eyes! Those cheeks! I miss the days when my Lucy would sit still long enough for those shots.
I saw your comment on RSM -- you have breastfeeding haters? What's up with that? I mean, there should really be no haters when it comes to that, but Mia isn't that "old". I don't get it. At all.

You have found on of the social benefits of having children, they are a great conversation piece. And thank goodness you have that, since they also rub snot on you and throw tantrums in the middle of every store within a 15 mile radius. For some reason, that makes it very difficult to make friends.

My four year old, Carly was standing next to me as I was loading the slideshow of your Christmas pictures.

She: Who is that baby?
Me: Her name is Mia.
She: How do you know that?
Me: Because I know who her Mommy and Daddy are.
She: Oh.
(a minute later, after watching with me)
She: There sure are a lot of pictures of Baby Mia.
Me: Yes there are. What do you think of her?
She: She's pretty.

Beautiful pictures. Thanks.

And good luck on the cream puffs.

Glad you made it through the play date! My hubby did some close up shots like that of our guy about a month ago. Damien and Mia look about the same with those fists crammed in their mouths. Gotta love teething!

I love play groups, but not for myself, for my kids. Both my girls (1 and 3) LOVE to play or ever just be around other kids. They are so much better behaved when we get out and play with other kids. And I guess it is good for me to get out of the house. :)

She's so yummy I could eat. I so understand you about the strangers thing. People assume because I did theater and managed people (50 of them) before I had my son--I'd welcome strangers and be comfortbale. NO. Afraid. I felt/feel stupid.

Hunter was and is still advanced so even know at 7 he wants to hang with the 10 year olds. Most 10 year old don't feel the same way..

I wish you luck mama.

too freaking cute! and she's on her tummy not screaming. how'd he manage that one? happy new year by the way.

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So the Fish Said...

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