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An actual conversation from last night, plus a line I didn't think of until this morning

Me: Were you groping my boobs in the middle of the night last night, or did I dream it?
Him: Probably.
Me: Probably?
Him: Probably I was groping your boobs.
Me: What do you mean, probably?
Him: I mean, I was alseep, but I probably did it. It sounds like something I would do.
Me: Something you would do while asleep.
Him: Yes.
Me: Because all the other women you are sleeping with have told you that you do this? So you can say it sounds like something you would do?
Him: No, I just mean it was probably a misguided attempt to cuddle.
Me: Ah.
Him: See?
Me: Yup, although you ought to be careful with that. You would hate to be in a business meeting and grab someone's crotch in a misguided attempt to shake hands.

Comments (25)

Funny. I always think of the perfect comeback one minute too late.

LOLOL. Misguided attempt to cuddle. Sounds like a man :-)

Grabbing a boob, isn't that most men's definition of cuddling?

But I do like your comeback...makes me think of a girls' night out post that I need to put up at some point...

"Cuddle"...yeah ok, Chris.

my husband is the KING of grabbing boob.

this morning i was blowing my hair dry and he just walked into the bathroom and grabbed a boob.

i think it's refreshing that he's so willing to accept responsibility even though he's not sure he actually did anything. most people would just start out by denying everything.

man. can i spin or what? :D

Wait - that isn't how we shake hands?

glad to hear my husband isn't the only man who does this... only, when he does this now, he loses a finger each time because, HELLO!! Nursing mother, sore boobies...

Oh dear, we have the Noctournal Boobie Grabbing at our house nightly. Except now that I am pregnant, my boobs hurt, so when he does it, he gets a sharp elbow wherever I can reach him.

Hah.

that was grate sounds like something that would happen to me!!

You are not alone in the mysterious middle of the night gropings - happens to me too. It's never misguided attempts to cuddle but a very sleepy attempt to get something started...so don't buy Chris' excuses!

Of course, I told him to hire a hooker - I mean assistant this morning, so really I'm no help at all!

Well, I'm jealous. My husband never grabs my boobs in his sleep. Since I've been having trouble sleeping for the past few months, it would at least break up the staring at the ceiling. :) You two always have the funniest conversations.

Shit that's funny. I'm really glad that I finally learned not to drink liquids while reading your's and Chris's sites. Love your last line.

ok that is too funny!!!

Sometimes I'll walk by someone at work and think to myself, "it's a good thing I didn't just grab his crotch." Which is odd, because why would I do that?

I'm just saying...

HA! That was a good one.

Apparently my friends sleep like that, spooning, and his hand's on her boob all night. "What? It's just a natural hand hold." *shrug*
Am single, so nobody's grabbing my boobs, inadvertently or otherwise.

oh, dude. you have no idea how many times my husband's done the same thing. i swear. they could find those things if in a coma.

My boyfriend often grabs varying body parts of mine in his sleep. Sometimes he is lucky enough to get a boob or my arse, but mostly he just gets a leg or something.

Must just be something men do, I guess...He also talks in his sleep, sometimes loudly - often in tongues.

I peed myself a little when I read that last line.

that last line cracked me up, lol!

LOL! Too funny!

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So the Fish Said...

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