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Big Decision

This is hard to talk about. I've been avoiding it because it is personal and also because I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings or start some sort of public feud with blame and recriminations. But, this has been on my mind for a long time now and I don't want to keep it a secret anymore, so I am going to just have to trust that those involved can be adult and put their hurt feelings behind them and see that I really only want what is best for all of us.

You see...

I've been thinking about getting a new Pretend Celebrity Boyfriend.

Now, don't get me wrong, Clive has been a great Pretend Celebrity Boyfriend. Since we've been together, his career has really taken off, which of course increases the cache for me. It's just that, well, look:

See, in the first few weeks after Mia was born, I watched Sex and the City while I was nursing, and ever since then I've been thinking I needed to develop a deep and meaningful relationship with Blair Underwood. So I decided I would list the pros and cons, and you can all help me decide. Here we go:

Pros:
Gorgeous
Check out those eyes
And the chin
And oh my god, the dimples
Has a little bit of that bad boy mystique
British, therefore, accent, therefore, hott
Doesn't he just look like he would be good in bed?

Cons:
Um, let's get back to this. I'm sure I'll think of something.

Pros:
Built. I mean seriously, have you seen this guy? Built.
The facial hair. Usually I hate, but on him, love.
Fabulous smile.
Fabulous voice.
Fabulous, um, fabulous.
Don't you just want to lick him?

Cons:
Gosh, stumped again.

So, what do you think? Clive? Blair? (Why do I like guys with sissy names?) Oh! Here's a thought! Can I have both? Please? I'll take very good care of them, I promise.

Sigh. What a decision.

Comments (54)

Grissom is definately creepy. Nope he doesn't do it for me. Not sure if anyone on that show, but I do like Horatio on CSI Miami!
Now if I were a guy, I think Catherine. She's my age and we all know that we late 40 models are HOT! LOL I think Sarah Sidel is just plain gross. Guess she and Grissom deserve each other!

Why do you only get one?

I see no reason you can't have both. I don't know if they could know about each other, though...

I would go with Blair becaus I don't know who this Clive person is?

Plus Blair used to hang out with Tootie and Natalie.

Who says you only get one?

I call dibs on Clive if you dump him!

On a TOTALLY unrelated note, I think you should go with Blair. No, really.

Definitely go with both. Hubba, hubba.

No that I'm picky or anything but Blair's head is too big and round. therefor you could never borrow his hat. Which is a bad thing for a girl trying to escape the poparazzi.
I say stay will Clive...maybe a little blair on the side but nothing serious with a head that size.

You can totally have both. Clive can be your Across the Pond love slave, and Blair can be your Homeland love slave. Easy as that!

You can have both, but only if you promise to feed, water, and walk them both AT LEAST once a day. Otherwise, back they go.

I'm all for Blair. He was smokin' on Sex and the City! (But I will admit that in the end I was glad Miranda picked nerdy Steve because he's just adorable.) Accent?? Who need's an accent when you have Blair? ;)

Personally, I think you should have a pretend celebrity boyfriend for every day of the week. Variety is the spice of life, and you never know what you're going to be in the mood for. BTW, thanks for the eye candy this morning!

Clive is nice and all but I would definitely go for Blair. Handsome, plus he just seems like such solid, good guy. Did you hear him on the Diane Rehm Show a while back? I wouldn't throw him out of bed for eating crackers, that's for sure.

Blair, definitely. You're at a different place in your life now. You need someone who can appreciate that. You deserve a change.

I'm gonna have to go with Blair. There's something smoldering inside him and I'm afraid that it's going to take a strong woman to fan the flames of that fire. He's got it goin' on, kiddo. Go with him.

Dang, I wish I had your pretend problems.

Gee, sucks to be you to have to pick... so I'm with the don't crowd. Maybe you should keep them both, you know, for a test to see which really is better. Wonder if there's someone out there that combines the best of both.

Why stop with just one?
Clearly they both have their..uh... redeeming qualities!

Hey, whatever happened to picking a Pretend Celebrity Girlfriend? ;-)

I've been reading here for quiet a while without leaving a comment but now I just have to jump in.

Perhaps it's time to take a look at another man that would blow those two out of the water.

Besides why have just one, have three, four even ten if you must to get you through your day!

Ahh nope I won't tell you who it is, he has enough woman after him, we don't need to add more!

Go with Blair. He's beautiful.

Variety is the spice of life, Fish. Find more, why not?

I think you're woman enough to have two (count 'em TWO) celebrity b/fs. In fact, I'm shocked that clive has handled you on his own for so long. He'd probably like a little break on occasion... ;-)

I think the real benefit to having a celebrity boyfriend is that YOU get to define the relationship. Blair has always been a hunka hunka burnin' love and because he is so wonderful he would totally understand if you had a bi-continental relationship with Clive. I mean, they are so different... and so committed to you, as their Non-Celibrity Girlfriend, they would understand.

Blair is, indeed, very lickable. Good choice.

I think it's perfectly reasonable to have a pretend *movie* celebrity boyfriend, and a pretend *TV* celebrity boyfriend as well. After all, you need dates for both the Oscars and the Emmys, right?

I'm still with Clive on this one. Blair is good, but I'm a sucker for blue eyes!

Hmmmm....yummy. Let's go with Blair. Hands down...or hand up... or hands anywhere he says to put them. ;) (Pretend of course, since I'm married to the hottest IT guy ever.)

Well! I am just shocked- shocked I tell you! I had no idea that my pretend celebrity boyfriend Clive was cheating on me. What good taste the man has (and tastes good!) to pick both of us.I feel strongly that you should move on to Blair and leave me to console my British honey. (Mmm, Clive and honey...) It sounds like you need a change, I can totally respect that.

I don't know why you wouldn't be able to have both of them as celebrity boyfriends, especially since they're from different countries. There should be an exception for that for sure!

i'm with the few who say stick with Clive. while Blair is handsome and i'm sure very traditionally charming, Clive just has something... an intangible quality, a spicyness. which works out well because as your Pretend Celebrity Boyfriend, he'll pretty much always be intangible.

Clive= yummy and spicy. like an altoid. perfect for you!

so you are dumping Clive, just because 10 months ago your eyes strayed. Why now? this doesnt make sense, there is more to this break up than meets the eye. did clive break up with you? did he get to big for you? did he cheat? frankly pretend celebrity boyfriends are so over-rated. i like pretend celebrity girlfriends, like I was the one that helped poor britnity install the car seat. what a prank....

Which one would appreciate your smokin' ass more? :) Personally, I'd dump Clive and go for the other guy... but that's just me. Clive has that bad-boy auroa about him that's such a turn on though.... let us know who you go with. Of course, you could always have a pretend affair with Blair, and not tell Clive. Then of course, you and Clive could get in a pretend argument, where you pretend to make up, and we all know that making up is the best part right? So you get some pretend sex out of the deal, along with the pretend affair. Sounds like a deal to me!!

Oh yeah, Blair be HOT.

Go with Blair. He is one yummy looking man. Hey, can I have a pretend boyfriend too?

Uhm. I hate to break it to you but Blair's taken. I called dibs on him years ago and have on more than one occassion mentioned my true love for this amazingly hott (hi, back up and read that again because he's just that fine. i'll give you time) man. hell, i think my feelings for him go back to the LA Law days and that riff he has in Full Frontal? To die for. Sure, I was a little disappointed by his role in Madea's Family Reunion and I thought maybe I couldn't continue to *heart* him muchly but I was wrong. So, yeah, sorry. You have to stick with Clive.

I say, go for it and have your cake and eat it, too.

A Clive and Blair and Beth sandwich, if you will.

Clive. Especially in glasses as he was in the Bourne Identity.

i've always been partial to blair underwood. but i tend to be partial to devistatingly handsome black men in general...

but clive does have the accent. and he's hott.

best of luck with the decision ;)

Um...Clive still for sure. Sorry that other guy just doesnt do it for me in any way.

Definitely John Cusack - oh, he wasn't one of the choices? Well, sorry, then I'm no help at all.

You'll have to fight me for Blair. He and I go all the way back to L A Law together (at least).

Clive all the way. There's no replacing Clive. Love him....Blair's a hottie, too. But, come on...Clive!

If a pasha can have a harem of beauties, why can't you have a bevy of hunks? Keep 'em both.

Clive has the accent.

End of story.

You keep both. Duh! The real dilemma is who do you pick to be your third pretend boyfriend - you know, for those times when Clive and Blair are both out of town. May I recommend Eric Bana? Or Paul Bethany?

Is one of them more likely than the other to pay off your mortgage once they see all the wonderful things you said about him? 'Cuz that's key!

Just sayin'.

I say keep 'em both, but if you have to choose, I would go for Clive. C'mon, he was King Arthur!!!
And while we are on the subject, would you mind if I put a PCB on my blog? He is not Clive or Blair...
let us know how you decide :)

Oh dear. I don't know how to break this to you, but...Blair's already taken, my dear. Oh yes. I have 2 celebrity boyfriends, and he's one of 'em. It all started on Sex and the City for me, too! "Phew!" ...feeling all flustamatized all of a sudden...

Oh, definitely both. Definitely.

LOL!

Why not both?

Blair sure has nice teeth.

Blair is HOT. Clive is...okay. Sorry he does nothing for me. Well he could do something for me, but I'd only give him a $10 for it.

Ummm... as a Brit I recall Clive from an incredibly dodgy series called Chancer... but as an older woman I remember Blair from LA Law... so... hmmm...

Yeah... I'd do them both....

After recently seeing Clive in that movie with Angelina Jolie (Across Border? Without Borders? Beyond Borders? something with borders involved), I would have to give him a slight lead. The scene where he gets tears in his eyes....*fans self*.

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So the Fish Said...

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I want to get a pet duck and keep it in the bathtub.
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