For those of you who would be interested in such a thing, Chris posted a picture of my underwear today. (Simmer down, McPervy.) Strangely, I am not embarrassed by my underwear showing up on the internet, but I am embarrassed that the underwear in question is a selection from the Decidedly Unsexy Collection. See, I can't really afford to buy anything new, so lately I've been going through this phase where I pull out something I never wear and decide that I love it, just because it is different. I eventually decide that whatever it is may be different, but it is also ugly, and back to the closet it goes. Anyway, for some reason I felt you needed to know that I never ever wear most of those, and now you know.
Speaking of not buying anything new, I just bought something new! I know, see how I just lied to you? I'm a bad person. Anyway, I bought a new pair of jeans, which I desperately needed because, let's face it, I'm just too fat for most of my old jeans and while I am trying to be a Hot Mama I am not interested in being a Hot Hoochie Mama, so new jeans had to be had. The thing I love best about my new jeans is that I got them for $13.83. They weren't really $13.83, but they were on sale and then I had a store credit from some stuff I returned a while ago and also had a few bucks left on a gift card someone gave me for something and so in the end I only paid $13.83. If only I had been able to use a coupon it would have been perfect. The thing I love second best about my new jeans is that I found a brand (Calvin Klein) and a style ("Missy" straight leg) where a six is comfortably loose, and you'd better believe that when I tried them on there was a resounding hallefuckinglujah ringing through the dressing room. Also, their short inseams are actually short, which is nice for stubby people like me. The thing I love least about my new jeans is that I could comfortably smuggle a couple of puppies in the waistband. Ok, maybe only one puppy, but they are too big in the waist and too big to comfortably address the problem with judicious belt application. So, this is just a really long-ass way of asking you guys whether you can have jeans taken in at the waist. What do you think?
Finally, there's a new video of Mia up today at Playgroup Dropout and you should totally check it out because a) she is freaking adorable, b) you can mock me for my pitiful video editing skillz, 3) you get to hear a couple of her newest words, and fish) there's a contest and everything, yo. I would just post it here too and save you the trouble, but tracking contest entries in two places just seems like entirely too much work to lazy (but smokin') ass old me. Come on, would it kill you to click this once? No, it would not.
And hey, I saw Hotty McBanktellersons yesterday and he gave me a sour apple lollipop. Do you think that means he wants me? I mean sure, he covered like it was for Mia, but she's clearly too young for lollipops, it was totally for me.
(Hey, I think that "a b 3 fish" thing is a way inside joke, but then I think maybe it isn't really and I just think it is. Is it?)
Comments (32)
he totally wants you. giving mia a lollipop was just a ploy to get closer to you.
Posted by nikki | January 24, 2007 8:21 AM
1) wouldn't really like my ugly set of underwear on the internet either
2) I guess you can get teh waist taken in. Why not?
3) lolli? Totally for you. Enjoy.
4) your kid is the cutest but you already know that.
Posted by Tuesday | January 24, 2007 8:22 AM
Well, of course he is trying to get to you through Mia with the lollipop.
I would think you could get the waist taken in, but then where would you carry the puppy?
yes,I am going to assume that it is an inside joke.
Posted by Diane | January 24, 2007 8:45 AM
The fact that he chose sour apple is crucial. He was really saying that he wants you to pucker up, baby.
Posted by Liz | January 24, 2007 8:51 AM
It would appear today is "embarass your wife" day (see my blog for more details)... although I didn't stoop as low as underwear...
Posted by Jeff | January 24, 2007 8:54 AM
You can most definitely have the waist taken in. Those of us with a smokin' (or in my case, just LARGE) ass seem to have this problem a lot!
Posted by Melissa | January 24, 2007 9:39 AM
So your underwear is on the internet, but hey, I mean, come on guys. I don't really wear that underwear; you bought jeans that are too big in the waist but short enough for you (isn't this the exact opposite of the normal problem?) and you're happy about it?; and Hotty McBanktellersons is sneaking you sweets...
This would be much better said and read in a full feed.
Posted by Adam | January 24, 2007 9:41 AM
You can totally just have the waist taken in. I would know - I watch TLC's What Not to Wear all the time. Stacy & Clinton are big into tailoring the fit. And since you got the jeans for such a steal it will be worth the money spent to tailor them!
Posted by Julie | January 24, 2007 10:22 AM
those mia words were tough, but i gave it my best shot at baby talk :) haven't ventured over to chris' site yet though, hmmmm not sure i wanna go....underwear?....your house seems like so much darn fun :) have a great day
Posted by Jodie | January 24, 2007 10:28 AM
waist? taken in? on jeans?
i wouldn't personally...but if you do..make sure you go to someone who can do jeans - otherwise they will come out a big ole' mess!
maybe they are just the wrong fit for you? jeans are really, really tough. i went to a place where they have hundreds of styles and they decide what would look best on you based on what you like adn your body type. i found awesome jeans that way. of course, they weren't $13....
buying something new feels great, though
Posted by ali | January 24, 2007 10:31 AM
That is one cute little girl you have there.
And the undies weren't all that bad. You should see some of mine. Er...maybe not.
Posted by Karly | January 24, 2007 10:37 AM
So, you got a size 6 and you're complaining that your fat?
Get out.
I mean it. Get out.
Posted by amanda | January 24, 2007 11:01 AM
Yes! I almost always have to have the waists on my jeans taken in- it is definitely doable. If you don't have a jean alter person (tailor, I think they're called, I'm a dummy sometimes), ask at some of the places where they sell the super high end jeans (like Nordstrom or Macy's). They usually have great recommendations.
Posted by Lulu | January 24, 2007 11:11 AM
oh, she's just cute with her words :) And I could totally tell that they were 8 distinct words...what 8 words, I'm not sure, but I totally got umbrella!
Hotty definitely wants you; sour apple = love always ;)
I recently (well, before Christmas) bought myself new underwear. I hadn't done that in oh, 3 years, at least. I love VS for their cute yet practical 5 for $25 cotton undies. Also ended up with 2 new pair of jeans, too, which was great since I hadn't bought jeans in equally as long. Too bad I won't be able to wear them much longer!
Posted by sweethomealagirl | January 24, 2007 11:15 AM
a, b, 3, fish - I spent a good 15 seconds trying to figure out where the opening parenthesis that ended "fish)" was ... then I got it ... heh-heh.
From my brief googling just now ... tailoring of Jeans is usually not that successful ... unless you find a denim expert ... and that will likely eat up all of your cool sale savings ... good luck though ...
Posted by Airwick | January 24, 2007 12:08 PM
Okay, and a few weeks ago when you complained about being fat and needing to lose weight, I felt really bad for you. Now I read size 6! Size 6! OMG woman! Size 6! I'm chunky wearing a size 14. I would so love to be a size 6!
No one has offered me a lollipop in like forever. Must be that you wear a SIZE 6!!!!!
Posted by Maribeth | January 24, 2007 1:31 PM
No worries. My underware is from the sexxy Fruit of the Loom collection! Hott!
And yes, you SHOULD feel sorry for my husband!
Posted by samantha jo campen | January 24, 2007 2:53 PM
That underwear is WAAAYYYYY sexier than the underwear I've been sporting lately (ahem...have you heard of "bubby underwear"?!)
Yeah, you can totally take jeans in at the waste.
Hottiemcbankguy totally TOTALLY diggs you. Work it, girl!
Heading over to PGDO asap. :)
Posted by Haley-O | January 24, 2007 2:56 PM
I think if you had let Mia wear your underewear on her head Hotty McBanktellersons would have given you much more than a sour apple lollipop. But, as McPErvy, I do say you have good taste in grey thongs. Nice!
~Jef
Posted by Edge - McPervy | January 24, 2007 3:48 PM
When you do feel like underwear shopping, get thee to Target. They have comfy underwear, and pretty, too! Very soft - even though I don't do the thong thing, too annoying. (It looked like some of your rejects were of the thong variety.)
And sour apple lollipops! Yummy! Also, hooray for new jeans. Sigh. I almost remember size 6 - so looooong ago.
Posted by Sam | January 24, 2007 3:58 PM
I'm glad none of my underwear is on the internet.
I think there's a chain called Denim Doctors, or something like that, that does alterations.
I have the same problem with waist/hip fit on jeans, and have had good luck lately with Levi's relaxed fit. Although, really, I was always bigger bootied than a 6, even at my pre-baby skinniest... so what are you griping about, exactly? ;P
The lollipop? Totally for you.
Posted by Kate the Shrew | January 24, 2007 5:02 PM
I found your whole a b c fish thing hysterical, so that might make it an indside joke.
Jeans are always too long for me and are frequently too big in the waist. I just picked up a pair of Lucky jeans for $19.95 and was very excited, but they are about a foot too long and I am going to try to shorten them myself. No way would I tackle the waist alteration though. That's what belts are for!
Posted by bad penguin | January 24, 2007 6:11 PM
oh, and also, who knows when you might need to smuggle a puppy?
Posted by bad penguin | January 24, 2007 6:12 PM
I heart you.
The end.
Posted by Kelly M. | January 24, 2007 7:37 PM
Sour apple? Yeah, he totally wants you. Now if had been grape or orange then I'd wonder a bit, but you're good with sour apple for sure!
Posted by Beth in StL | January 24, 2007 8:17 PM
a b 3 fish sounds like something my high school buddies used to put into the newsletter.
Posted by liz | January 24, 2007 8:58 PM
I don't see why you would be embarrassed unless you wear the underwear in the same fashion as Miabean.
...that would be so cool!
Posted by Rick | January 24, 2007 10:43 PM
I didn't get a chance to read all the comments, but darts are what you are looking for. I've had the same problem with jeans all my life. They fit in the hips, but never the waist. My mom would always have my grandma or my aunt put in a couple of darts [1 on each side, around the small of my back]so my jeans would fit.
If you lived near me, I'd send you to Miss Bea. She does my dart's now! heh
Check this out..
http://www.sewing.org/enthusiast/html/el_darts.html
Posted by Suzy | January 25, 2007 2:29 AM
So, I have to ask, do you watch Grey's Anatomy or are you just mcstealing? ;)
Posted by Traci | January 25, 2007 10:02 AM
Back before I was a mom I always bought expensive jeans, Sevens, Citizens, Joes Jeans. Before I moved out of NYC I bought 2 new pairs and now they all have holes in them from wearing them playing on the floor with Samantha! So then I bought some jeans at the Gap, and they're just okay but at least I won't care when the knees eventually get worn in. So what I'm trying to say is... as a mom I'll all for $13 jeans.
Posted by Taryn | January 25, 2007 11:38 AM
sour apple = totally wants to run away to Mexico with you
Posted by Isabel | January 25, 2007 12:31 PM
It sounds like you're about my size, so I break my general no-comment policy to suggest that you check out the uber-hoochie teeny-bopper store Aeropostale for their stretchy jeans. If you can find them on sale (and they go on sale every so often), they're only $20/pair, and they are literally the only brand of jeans that I've found that can fit my short-and-thin-but-not-skinny frame. Love those jeans.
Posted by Angela | January 25, 2007 1:53 PM