Before moving on to today's regularly-scheduled post, I feel I must mention that Mia jumped yesterday. Actual jumping with empty space under both kissable little toddler feet at the same time. It was very exciting. It was so exciting that she ran over to the oven so she could watch herself do it in the reflection from the oven door and fell flat on her face. We tried not to laugh. Too much.
Moving on, I've been slacking on the diet lately. I know, shut up. Yesterday was going to be the day that I rededicated myself to my diet in order to achieve maximum MILFosity in time for our beach trip in May. But then the washer overflowed and I spent three hours dealing with the flood in the basement and bailing out the washing machine (twice, because I am an idiot and decided to refill it to see if the same thing happened again, which, yes) and moving the huge heavy shelves out of the laundry room so I could mop underneath them and lo, it did sucketh.
After that I spent a few minutes looking at the price of new washing machines, and that's when the stress got to me and I broke down and ate a Cadbury Egg. Or four. And not those stupid mini eggs either, oh no, not for me. So I guess today is the day I rededicate myself to my diet.
However, I hate dieting and have therefore decided that rather than working to make myself skinnier I am instead going to dedicate myself to making the rest of you fatter so that I will seem skinnier by comparison. To that end, I am giving you the best cookie recipe of all time, ever. I already sent this to Swistle, but she's thirty-something weeks pregnant so making her fatter is not much of a challenge. Now, it is your turn. Time to chubby up, people! I have to be seen in public in a bathing suit in less than two months, so you all need to start packing on the pounds pronto.
Grandma Lucille's Monster Cookies
1 stick margarine, softened
1 c sugar
1 c brown sugar
1 1/2 c peanut butter
1 teaspoon Karo
4 1/2 c oatmeal (quick cooking)
2 t baking soda
6 oz chocolate chips
Stir sugars 1 c at a time into softened margarine, add eggs and beat, add peanut butter, Karo, and chocolate chips. Beat well. Add oatmeal a cup at a time, mix well until all oatmeal is added. Batter will be very stiff. Place on cookie sheet by the teaspoonful. Press 2-3 M&Ms on top of each cookie. Bake at 350 for 15 minutes.
None of that pesky flour in this recipe, it's really just a waste of valuable cookie space anyway. The peanut butter is easy to get out of measuring cups if you spray the cup with cooking spray first.