I have been working with the assumption that I will go into labor at the absolute most inconvenient moment possible. That is why I booked something for Mia and I to do every single day this week, certain that doing so would cause me to go into labor in the wee small hours of Monday morning and have to try to deliver a baby while figuring out how to get ahold of everybody and cancel a week's worth of plans. Clearly, not so much. So when my friend Laura asked if I could watch her two girls this morning, I was thrilled. Obviously if I didn't go into labor in the middle of last night, thereby ruining Laura's day, it would happen when I was the sole adult responsible for three children. Again, not so much.
On the plus side, I survived a morning with three children. In fact, it was easy. So easy it got me thinking hey, I should have another baby! Very convenient. The fact is that Laura's girls are so good that my only real reason for being here was to dispense snacks and I could have spent the rest of the time snoozing on the couch to no ill-effect. (Laura, I didn't do that, I promise.) The only hitch was that I gave the youngest some banana slices and she had a great time rubbing them all over her pants and then spit a mouthful of milk on her own shirt moments before her mother got back and I was so mortified by the layer of filth covering the child that I seriously considered hiding her in the closet and trying to convince Laura that no, really, she only had one daughter, I was positive.
It really is getting to be time for this baby to come out though, as I have even finished nesting. Seriously, the hospital bag is packed, the laundry is done, the presents for and from the baby are wrapped, I vacuumed the upstairs for the first time in a month, and I sewed up the hole in the chair cushion that has been there for at least two years. I've made a $500 trip to Costco, and spent at least that much again at both Target and the grocery store, because apparently when I have no need to buy baby clothes I replace it with the need to buy a 12 month supply of toothpaste, toilet paper, and frozen waffles. My house is reasonably clean and Chris has been fully instructed on what Mia is to wear to the hospital to meet the baby and what she is to wear when we bring him home. If I don't go into labor soon, I'm going to have to get a hobby.
(Yeah, I know my cookies aren't cookie-ing. Working on it.)