Still pregnant.
Welcome to my Alternate Due Date! If you trust sonogram #3, this baby is due this very day. If you trust sonogram #2, he's due on Sunday, and if you trust sonogram #1 he is entitled to inhabit my uterus until next Friday. We hate sonogram #1, we never invite him to parties. I've still got nothing over here, but I am planning to take Mia to visit the Hotty Pediatrician this morning to discuss (yet again) the Poop Issue, so the smart money is on my water breaking as soon as he enters the room. Because that would be hott and give us something to laugh about for years to come. And by "us" I obviously mean you and me, because I would be forced to never see him again as long as I live. Sure sure, medical professional, seen it all before, but it would just ruin all the fun, don't you think?
I cleaned three bathrooms yesterday, including the floors which I tend to pretend that I forgot about. Not, you understand, because I feel this child needs some sort of pristine environment to come home to, germs make you tough, but because I was hoping a little toilet scrubbing would shake him out of there. No such luck. But at least I got to admire the nice clean bathroom each of the six times I got up to pee last night. I also ate a spicy curry for lunch and spent two hours with a friend who has recently sent two women rushing for labor and delivery (to deliver babies, not just for jollies) and none of it did anything for me.
And I've been saying all along that I wasn't in a rush, no hurry, no need for this child to be born early, but I would like to retract that. I don't know how some of you go weeks and weeks past your due dates, but I am done being pregnant. Finished. Over it. Time to get out of there, little man. I'll give you a cookie.




Comments (47)
Take a hot bath, that triggered Lisa's birth! And that other trick in the book also helps. But I would never tell a 40 week pregnant lady to go and 'be polite' (you called it that :) with her husband. But it can help :)
Hang in there! Wally will come any day now.
Posted by Nadine | February 6, 2008 7:32 AM
My Nanny says the day you feel good enough to scrub things, is the day you should expect to go. So you still have a few hours since the scrubbing occurred... maybe...?
Hope so. I'm feelin' ya. Can't wait to meet that boy!
Posted by el-e-e | February 6, 2008 7:36 AM
My g'friend, head OB/Gyn nurse at local hospital swears eating pepperoni pizza as a common denominator with the onset of labor.
Posted by Nancy | February 6, 2008 7:38 AM
Hang in there on both the birth and poop fronts! My oldest had poop issues, too. His pediatrician had us give him Milk of Magnesia so he couldn't hold it in, but it was still struggle. We had some measure of success by making a Poopie Star Chart on the fridge. He got a star for every successful poopie. It was a fairly successful motiviational tool. Weird, but whatever works. Good luck!
Posted by mooalex | February 6, 2008 8:04 AM
I say that he is waiting to pop out at least one stretch mark on that flawless belly of yours:) hang in there and good luck
Posted by D | February 6, 2008 8:19 AM
That's it........bribe him with a cookie! ha ha ha too funny!
Hoping he makes his appearance for you very very soon. Hang in there and good luck :)
Posted by Mary | February 6, 2008 8:22 AM
One more thing.........have someone pull your toes. No joke....when I was pregnant, my mom talked to a neighbor who is an acupuncturist. She told my mom to pull my (I foreget which one) toe and it is supposed to induce labor. So in came my mom and she pulled my toe real hard before I could fight her off. I kid you not, my water broke that night! Have someone pull each of your toes!
Posted by Mary | February 6, 2008 8:25 AM
I guessed today in the pool, so let's get to it!
Posted by Bah | February 6, 2008 8:33 AM
someone told me once - 'love your husband my dear. Love got the baby in there, and it'll get it out!' lol!
I felt this way 4 days or so before my labours. You sound like you're nearly done cooking Wally to me :)
oh and poop issue - DS2 at that age could hang onto it for 5 days! Smoothies worked wonders, and he did indeed grow out of it :)
Posted by mamacrow | February 6, 2008 8:37 AM
Maybe you could use some of this.
Posted by Joanne | February 6, 2008 8:43 AM
You poor thing! I'm sending some good vibes your way :)
Posted by Sparkle Pants | February 6, 2008 8:44 AM
I helped my husband paint my mother's dining room the day before I went into labor. Whether that was what helped me along or what, I don't know.
Posted by Kim | February 6, 2008 8:46 AM
I'm hanging in there right with you...1 day past my due date now and miserable as can be. I'm still working too - which stinks even more, but I have no choice.
I scheduled an induction for Friday though - I refuse to wait any longer than that! I'm done being PG too!!
Posted by Krystyn | February 6, 2008 8:56 AM
haven't commented in a while, mainly because i switched jobs and have been adjusting to new routines at home and stuff, but I wanted to stop by and tell you good luck with the labor and birth of your new little one, just in case i don't get a chance to comment again before you go. I'll be thinking of you! Oh, and, my mom says she was two weeks early with my sister because she went over to my aunt's 4th floor walk up apartment and walked up the stairs and that triggered labor :-)
Posted by LFM | February 6, 2008 9:00 AM
I have no idea how to tell you to get him to come out, both of my boys were induced.
Even though the longer you are pregnant the more miserable you become I suppose its better for him - I am sure he will at least be crawling by the time he comes out - at least it sure seems that way!
Posted by Steff | February 6, 2008 9:26 AM
Boys, they are stubborn, eh?! A nice pedicure with a bright color - maybe he will know it is nice and bright and your feet look cute so he will want to see them.
For the record, 2-1/2 weeks late last time will not happen this time around. If I am one week late I would schedule to be induced. I could not deal with that amt of time again! I was over the edge by the time I was actually induced the last time.
I will send water breakage/contractions starting vibes all day!!
Posted by Christina | February 6, 2008 9:31 AM
Sending my best labor vibes...
Posted by Susan | February 6, 2008 9:43 AM
I love reading everybody's suggestions for getting labor revved up. I'll be thinking "go into labor" thoughts for you. Good luck!
Posted by Mandee | February 6, 2008 9:46 AM
I have a friend who swears that Chinese take out sent her into labor with all 3 of her boys. Could be worth a shot?
Posted by Traci | February 6, 2008 9:47 AM
Maybe he wants more ice cream?
Posted by diane | February 6, 2008 10:05 AM
Having never had children, I don't have any suggestions for inducing labor (as if you haven't heard every old wives tale that is out there, by now!), but I wanted to offer you support and good vibes for your last day(s) of pregnancy. Also, if you have your little bebe today, that'd be pretty sweet, since it's a great day to be born! I'm celebrating my 25th today, and I'd be pleased to share the day with your little one :) All my best.
Posted by Gaby | February 6, 2008 10:05 AM
Sounds like you have lots of interesting food to try and eat.
But I like the idea of a cookie bribe!
Posted by crookedeyebrow | February 6, 2008 10:05 AM
My RMT used to stay away from my ankles... until it got near the end of my pregnancy. Have some real raspberry tea and get a massage. Tell her/him to work like a dog on your ankles! :)
Contraction Vibes coming your way.... just give them time to break through the snow and ice pellets! LOL!
Posted by Holly | February 6, 2008 10:12 AM
I too swore I wouldn't be one of those complaining moms. Still, at the end, I was moaning, "I can't take another day!" Now, ten years later, I can publicly admit that I starved my little guy out. Seven hours of not eating and he decided to take his chances on the outside. NOT recommended!
Posted by WhatIsItNow | February 6, 2008 10:15 AM
two things:
First, sprinkle Miralax on everything she eats. It dissolves and is completely tasteless and odorless.
Second, this is something that saved my sanity after Seth was born...Buy Tucks Medicated pads!!! Even if you don't require stitches, you will be sore and swollen on your lady-bits. Use the pads after every bathroom trip. They numb the area and keep you from getting an infection around the stitches. They also feel GREAT!
Now, go dangle a cookie between your legs to coax that stubborn dude out of there!
Posted by Holy Schmidt! (Melanie) | February 6, 2008 10:30 AM
Hang in there Beth!
Posted by Lauren | February 6, 2008 10:43 AM
your baby really will love you less if you don't have sparkly bathrooms.
hahaha.
i did the exact same thing before giving birth!
Posted by ali | February 6, 2008 10:56 AM
Anti-poop toddlers: glycerin suppositories will make them poop in 15 minutes, the most stubborn toddler cannot refuse.
Dear baby in Beth's belly:
GET OUT NOW.
Posted by jessica | February 6, 2008 11:04 AM
I went 12 days over with my daughter. Since I was induced at not quite 39 weeks with my son, the twelve days past forty weeks liked to have killed me. All of my due date buddies in my son's playgroup had their babies before me. When I got the call that I was the last one standing, I literally laid in bed, crying for hours.
No one's ever been pregnant forever! And when I did go into labor it lasted four hours, which was kind of awesome. My midwife didn't even make it in time and my husband ended up catching the baby (which I want to add, was the last thing in the world he wanted to do. You should have seen his face when I said the baby was coming RIGHT NOW.)
Posted by Ashley | February 6, 2008 11:15 AM
Pfft. Why should he come out into the cold cold world, when you're already feeding him cookies right in the confines of his cozy womb?
Posted by statia | February 6, 2008 11:19 AM
Typical man, can't get him out of there and once you do he'll spend the rest of his life trying to get back into one. Good luck, I'll be anxiously awaiting on the edge of my seat for any news!
Posted by Mom On The Run | February 6, 2008 11:47 AM
Lurker here...but I took a long trip to Ikea, bought a dresser, came home and tried to put it together then gave up, decided I needed to vaccuum under my bed, had to flip the mattress to do so...and ended up in labour a few hours later. It was a massive nesting fest that did it for me I guess...
Hope that little guy comes out soon for you :)
Posted by Angie | February 6, 2008 11:58 AM
Offer a fig newton.....maybe a different enticement is needed. ;-)
Posted by David | February 6, 2008 12:08 PM
I have no good suggestions-- two of mine were planned C-sections, and the first was three weeks early. My water broke the day I scrubbed all the floors in the house.
I have heard that great, sudden bursts of energy are linked to going into labor, so here's hoping it's today!
Posted by jen | February 6, 2008 12:39 PM
have lots of sex and orgasms (not necessarily at the same time).
make a castor oil milkshake and spend the afternoon in the bathroom.
worked for me. and really, as awful as these suggestions are, they're not worse than being pregnant another day, right? maybe...
Posted by mamadaisy | February 6, 2008 12:58 PM
With my first I went to the midwife visit on my due date. They checked me and said I was 2 cm and it could be weeks. So I went home and scrubbed our very large (we lived in an old Victorian in PA) kitchen floor (probably 25 X 30 or so) on my hands and knees with a little scrub brush. It did start my labor -8 minutes apart- but I wouldn't recommend it. I stayed in labor for three days. For two and a half of those days my contractions stayed at 8 minutes apart. On the late part of the second day, they broke my water. Finally, finally, Kangaroo made his appearance at 9AM the next morning.
I don't recommend pushing mother nature.
Posted by ocdcontrolfreak | February 6, 2008 1:12 PM
I tried everything when I was pregnant. Eating spicy food (even a "prego" pizza from the local pizza joint, said to make women go into labor). Having the uncomfortable, get-this-kid-OUT sex, long walks, bumpy car rides... nothing. AND my SOB doctor forced me to go to exactly 14 days overdue. The only thing I didn't try was the castor oil, because based on my track record, I would spend the day in the bathroom in agony only to remain stubbornly pregnant.
Hope that little guy comes out soon. We're all anxious to meet him!
Posted by Jennie | February 6, 2008 1:16 PM
My sister swears by castor oil, and her kids flew out. Must be the lube.
Posted by Autumn Dahlia | February 6, 2008 1:18 PM
Try some acupressure to induce labor. There's a reason that they tell pregnant women to not have someone massage their feet when they're not far enough along.
Have Chris try some of these:
http://www.maternityacupressure.com/acupressure-start-labor/reflexology-to-induce-labor.html
Posted by Kelley | February 6, 2008 1:28 PM
Sex. I've heard it works, as crappy timing it would be. Sending lots and lots of labor vibes your way. My guess is you'll be poping little Wally out tomorrow. He wouldn't want to have an all even birthday, just to be difficult, I'm guessing. Hey, maybe he's waiting for Mia to poop so it's one less thing you'll have to worry about. Good luck, hope you're staying somewhat comfortable!
Posted by Dianna | February 6, 2008 1:53 PM
i must admit, the thought of having a 42 week old baby inside me is just weird. They should come out when ripe, no? Not when they are past the due date, i just cant help but thinking of fruit:) Now that we've been given the go ahead, i'm totally sending you hardcore labor vibes!
Posted by bethany | February 6, 2008 2:07 PM
Dang! I keep hoping to come here and see that you had the baby!
I went 2 weeks overdue with my newest kiddo and I so know how you feel. It sucks. And I tried it all, even Castor oil. NEVER AGAIN.
Posted by Kristie | February 6, 2008 4:07 PM
I went almost 2 weeks past my due date when pregnant with my bear. Swear to Sue it almost killed me. I tried everything. Spicy food, scrubbing, sex, accupuncture, Evening Primrose Oil...you name it. What worked for me, finally, was scheduling my induction. Wouldn't you know that as soon as I visited my OB and was given orders to show up at the hospital that very night, I went into labor. Fortunately this allowed me to by-pass triage and just check right into my room.
Hang in there, honey. It'll be over soon. But damn if this home stretch doesn't SUCK.
Posted by Meegan | February 6, 2008 5:52 PM
Poor thing.. I hope he vacates the premises soon! I'm hesitant to suggest too much in the way of old wives tales. Maybe try an excercise ball and use it as a birthing ball? They say the circular motion you can do on those things will help get him positioned and sometimes help dialation. They also recommend using one after the baby is born to help sooth fussiness. *shrugs*
Sending good vibes your way!
Posted by Suzy | February 6, 2008 6:01 PM
I think it's very rude of him to be waiting so long to show up! You'll have years to torture him with the fact that he made you so miserable for so long! LOL
Posted by Maribeth | February 6, 2008 6:21 PM
Oh my goodness, I am so happy you haven't had him yet because I just came across the PERFECT name! (In case you are still iffy and if Mia is truly afraid.) A research participant I'm working with is named Keven. Kevin is a slightly dorky name, I think, not sure why, but it's actually a quite unoffensive, traditional and respectable name, but the -en ending makes it so much classier, don't you think?! I immediately thought of you. Mia and Keven... Hm, well, now that I see it in writing, maybe not so must-have-it-or-die, but in any case, I think it's a very attractive name.
(Oh, and sorry to rub it in that I'm happy he's still in there. My first was right on time, and my second tortured me by being 7 days late, and oh.my.god I can v v v much relate to irrationally wanting to strangle my mother for making me feel that my uterus was inconveniencing or disappointing her.)
Posted by Sabrina | February 6, 2008 7:49 PM
I was so proud of myself for making it one week past my due date with Kara, but it didn't do any good. I had to be induced and ended up with a c-section to deliver my 11 pound, 4 oz baby (!). Next time? I'm totally doing a scheduled c-section two weeks before. Maybe then I'll get a normal eight-pounder.
Posted by Frema | February 8, 2008 12:43 AM