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Somewhat less pissy

Since you asked, the NP took it upon herself to chastise me for breastfeeding on demand, regaling me with all the ways in which it would damage my child. It seems that all three of her perfect children were breastfeeding only three times a day by six weeks. Sadly, I was too flabbergasted at being slammed for the way I feed my child by someone who should damned well know better to offer any response, but wish I had been quick enough to come back with Leah's suggestion of "And your children survived? You didn't have to take them to the ER for rehydration?" Ah well, next time. Not that there will be a next time with this woman, but I will be better prepared for the next idiot who recommends starving my child.

Comments (34)

So then I bet she would have been really happy with me that I breastfed mine on demand pretty much until they weaned themselves. Kids are little for such a short time and who is anyone to judge what someone else does with their kids? That would have made me cranky too!

Oh my F*'N GAWD (I only save this phrase for special occasions). I thought maybe she chastised you for things that I usually do like carry my three-year-old instead of making her walk or let her run around the backyard without pants on. Or maybe you let your infant get bitten by fire ants because you were busy blogging (oh wait, that was me). But nursing on demand? You have to be kidding me. Some people just need to be sent out to pasture.

Maybe I'm being pissy too, but I might find some literature that outlines how INSANE and MISINFORMED she is and mail it to her, with a note saying "It's a good thing I know better, you may want to educate yourself before you share your misinformation with someone who might believe you".

yea, I think I'm pissy too.

Ok, now I really want to know... how could feeding your child when he's hungry damage him? I have never heard that before, only that it's taxing on the parent.

I always aim to please. :)

Yes, you need more screaming in your life. Stop feeding!

I hope you take up Varinia's suggestion because I totally would. That NP is spreading serious misinformation. I don't even think the die-hard Babywise people would advocate getting down to only three feedings by six weeks. (But I didn't read that book so I don't really know.)

Seriously. Do it. Avenge the boobs!

* insert sound of my jaw dropping, hitting floor.

That NP is an idiot. I nursed my daughter on demand until she weaned herself at 20 months and I am nursing my son on demand until he weans himself (he's almost 15 months). Obviously there has been no permanent damage to my daughter for doing it this way.

I'd send a letter of complaint re: the NP. And then demand an apology. Or her head on a platter.

But then, maybe I'm just feeling pissy.

I can't believe someone would say that, much less someone in the medical profession. Argh! Sometime in my life, I hope to have the guts to say, "Well, you're entitled to your opinion. You are WRONG but certainly entitled." I've had a few too many occasions where that would be appropriate, but I'm always too flabbergasted in the moment to say it.

By the way, my brain was so tied up in feeling irate on your behalf as I was reading that I misread the middle of your post and thought Leah's suggestion was that you say, "And you didn't have to take them to the RIVER to rehydrate?" :-)

I am very, VERY non-confrontational in situations like this. I wouldn't say anything to the NP; I would just fantasize about possible replies angrily when I should have been sleeping. I'm good with a letter of complaint (I'm polite, and because it's in writing I have time to remove the spittle specks), but I wouldn't know who to send it to in this case.

I should have my ped call her..because he is the one that told me to do ON DEMAND!!!!!


She has a medical license?

Oh yes, a letter of complaint

It never fails to amazing me how incredibly stupid medical officials cane be about child rearing. It's startling, really.

And yeah, I feel for those kids of hers.

You, on the other hand? AWESOME MAMA for knowing what your child needs (not wants, NEEDS) and giving it to him. You're a supper star.

WHAT damage, pray tell, are you doing to your infant by feeding on demand?

3 times a day? Considering the fact that I eat at LEAST 6 times a day - I can't imagine eating 3 times a day . . .

I eat way more than three times a day, and I'm not looking to double my weight within 6 months! I feed on demand, within reason. I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to cut out what *should* be unnecessary feedings, say, when I'm hallucinating from lack of sleep, but I also don't have a problem nursing my 5 month old every two hours during the day to compensate for it.

I think a letter to the doctor of the practice is almost required.

In response about the 'die-hard Babywise' people. I don't want to be lumped in with the NP. I am a die hard believer in the Babywise idea, um, read schedule. That said, I can assure you that 3 meals a day isn't appropriate for any child pretty much under 5.
Babywise folks aren't about starving their kids (I so don't starve mine), we are about schedules and expectations. Please don't put me in the group with the insane NP lady.

That is ridiculous. Did you call the office and tell someone? I would definitely make a formal complaint. Someone giving that advice to a new mother could very well convince her to abandon breastfeeding altogether.

And could you imagine if I walked in there and BOTTLE FED my child with FORMULA on demand? Methinks it would have caused her head to simply explode.

I mean, I'm all for a schedule just to help keep everyone on track, but aren't kids pretty much self-regulating? You're not going to over-feed your breastfed baby, and so: if your child is hungry, how about feeding him? Revolutionary I know, but we're cutting edge up here in the Cricket house.

Ohmigosh. You have no idea of the level of hell I would have unleashed if an NP had said that to me.

GAH! Wow the restraint you showed not to clobber her is amazing. I surely would have. NOT HER FREAKING BUSINESS! Wow.

That would have been it for me. I've never told someone off, but I sure has hell would have with her! What is she nuts?

I'm with everyone else that has suggested this batshit crazy woman needs to be checked. And hey, that would mean seeing the hottie pediatrician, right? Does that cancel out the good deed part? Either way . . .

As a Clinical Nurse Specialist (akin to the NP except we only see adults) I can assure you that this is NOT medically correct and NOT what they teach in nursing graduate school. They specifically teach on-demand nursing and textbooks even state that babies feed on average every 2-3 hours except during their longer sleep periods (which start right around when they are 12 lbs.) where they may go 4-8 hours without nursing depending on the child.

You need to write a letter to the physician in charge of the practice. Especially if this is a family practice (versus a specialty practice like dermatology), the MD needs to know the information the NP is giving to her patients. In a family practice, this would include new parents as she could be seeing newborns/babies for well-child checks, etc. In a specialty practice she is talking out of her ass as you weren't there for concerns about nursing.

I would definitely send a letter to the MD or whoever the NP reports to. That's horrible advice and it was clearly unwarranted. When I think of what little kittens my kids were at six weeks, I want to weep for that idiot's children. I still bf my 7.5 month old whenever, I just don't know how else we would do it. Sometimes she's teethy and grumpy and doesn't nurse well and she wants to nurse one hour later. Not all the time, but sometimes. What should I do, *explain* to her that she gets three meals a day and that's it? When I'm her only source of nutrition and (especially) water? Sheesh.

Yeah so I don't nurse on demand, and that pissed me off! So she HAD 3 kids right? Cause I would think they would be DEAD nursing 3 times a day at 6 weeks. What an idiot.


I was taught that nursing on demand was best (at first) and then you could continue, or go to a schedule - whatever worked for you. There was no harm in either way, as long as they get enough (which at three times a day at six weeks? I don't think so...).

Even though I work out of the home, I was "on-demand" the entire time I nursed and/or pumped. Breast or bottle - he set his schedule. And eventually, he did have a schedule which he created - I did not.

I now have a very healthy, happy, well-adjusted 19-month-old, who eats meals at normal times, snacks as normal, and I'm trying to figure out how on-demand could damage a child...


I hate "educated" morons.

My mind is boggled. Really. I'm with everyone else in that she really needs to be checked with her spreading MISINFORMATION. Damaging misinformation! Could you send a letter to the HR person at the clinic?

Not to mention that sometimes our children who breastfeed are simply THIRSTY? Like you know, you and I get thirsty? Surely she doesn't only drink when she eats. Or expect children to.

I get that shit too, so yeah, she should go f-off. I mean, if the kid is hungry, it stands to reason that YOU WOULD FEED HIM OMG.

And I also agree sending a complaint letter of sorts to HR, because apparently I'm feeling confrontational today.

what the F***?! This isn't even the current World Health Organisation advice! this Woman's manager needs to know and she needs to be STOPPED before she gives the same WRONG advice to a young empresionable mother and something tragic happens.

(only 3 times a day at 6 weeks?! most of mine were a good four hour rythm by then but only 3 times?! that's mad!

3 feeding at 6 weeks? I honestly believe she can hurt babies when she gives that advice to new mommies! I'd definitely either call or write a letter of complaint.

That woman is delirious. Roo is now 7 months old, and she still is on 4 feedings a day. And if she wants more? She gets it.

I know I'm late on commenting on this but... wha?
3 times a day at 6 weeks???
That doesn't even make sense. That doesn't seem right. I don't think that's something she should be recommending (or bragging about?).

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