I took the kids to a birthday party this morning at Rat Hell, and after I had been there a while, I noticed that I was being checked out rather more widely than usual ("usual" being "not at all"). Nothing leering or nasty, I just noticed myself being noticed. And I thought to myself, "Well damn, I guess 35 is working for me after all. I'm sorry I called bullshit on you, 35. I take it all back."
Then I noticed that many of the women were checking me out too.
And then I noticed that all these people who suddenly thought I was noticeably hot were staring only at my forehead.
Which is when I realized that nobody was checking me out, they were checking out the mountainous zit on my forehead. Which has increased quite considerably in girth since the picture below was taken, but I can't bring myself to subject all of you to an update.
You're just fucking with me now, 35, and I can see I'm going to have to show you who's boss.