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Completely about the Actual Dishwasher

It is a complete coincidence that this is the one year anniversary of a post I wrote about unloading the dishwasher, which I thought was quite clearly not really about unloading the dishwasher, but I was the only person who felt that way. I learned that the actual dishwasher is a rather touchy subject for many of you.

To be perfectly clear, for the remainder of this post, whenever I refer to a dishwasher, this is precisely what I mean:

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So then I wrote a follow-up post explaining the misunderstanding, and confessing that while I had not been talking about the dishwasher, I did in fact have a dishwasher problem. And I hate to quote myself, but I want to save you all from the boring click-throughs, so the problem I mentioned was:

"And ok, I do have one issue with the dishwasher. Actually, it is Chris's issue. He gets very upset when he puts something in the dishwasher and I move it. He feels that I am criticizing him, trying to make him feel incompetent, some crap like that. I cannot make him understand that I am just trying to load the dishwasher in a way that will result in fitting as much as possible into it and all of those things getting clean and that I constantly move things that I loaded into the dishwasher myself with the same goal in mind. I reload the dishwasher, and it makes my husband very angry."

It therefore strikes me as ironic that Chris loaded the dishwasher last night. I had run the dishwasher in the afternoon, so it was completely empty when Chris took the reigns. And this morning, I was met with this:

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Now, I'm sure that you could come up with a more random, less efficient, completely space-wasting way to load those dishes into that dishwasher, but I think you would have to try really, really hard.

And just for the sake of honestly, here's how I fixed it:

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Comments (23)

Um, yeah. I would have rearranged that too, sensitive husband's feelings be damned. :-)

I would've had to rearrange it too.

P.S. We have those exact same square toddler plates with the blue monkey & the pink flowers. I heart Target.

I'm convinced our mothers made most of us this way by drilling into us how to do certain things. I am anal about loading the dishwasher and folding clothes. I worse now as it's my home. How the clothes are folded and how they are organized in the linen closet is my major pet peeve. I yell at my son at least a few times a week because he is always messing up my organized and tidy closet.


I would have reloaded that as well. I'm picky about how my dishwasher gets loaded. And I have to be. I have 6 people in my house. I have to fit as much in as possible AND make sure the dishes all get clean.

I feel your pain! We have the same dishwasher and, despite the logical order of the racks, my husband and daughter also just randomly stick dishes in all higgledy-piggledy, too. And don't get me started on the top rack!


While I don't have the luxury of a dishwasher (BOOOO!!! WAHHHHH!), I love your way of loading it much better. when we go on vacation, I FIGHT eeryone in the house, :NO!!! I get to do the dishes tonight! it's MY turn!"

love your blog...been reading you since Mia was a baby.

I am always rearranging the dishwasher after my husband puts things in. I have determined that as women we have been sold a line of bullshit when we were told back in elementary and high school that boys were better with geometric/spacial relations. If that were true they would do a better job of loading the dishwasher and would build IKEA furniture in less than 4 hours. Seriously.

My husband will spend five minutes rearranging dirty dishes to get that last plate to fit. I will spend two minutes washing the plate by hand. I claim to win the Efficiency Battle, as does he.

Would you rather Chris leave the dishes in the sink? If you have to rearrange them, he might as well not loaded them at all, right? He hasn't saved you any effort, plus now he's all huffy and insulted.

Crucial question for me: did you rearrange the dishes just to "fix" them? Or would your other stuff really not fit without tinkering? How would Chris have added the additional stuff, if he had to work around his original placement? Would he never - ever ever ever ever never - move an item once he's placed it in the dishwasher? Because if he would move stuff himself, he needs to stop being such a big crybaby. If you moved dishes just to fix them, he should stop loading the dishwasher.

If things aren't getting clean because of his loading style, that's an entirely different issue - but it looks like even with his um, spacious style, stuff would still get clean, right?

I'll be honest: while I *like* you're way of loading better, and it's probably how I would have done it to begin with, I'm not sure your way made any more space or will allow the dishes to get cleaner. Some of that depends on what *else* you had to load in, but for just that stuff, I'd say you're pretty even.

I found that abandoning the dishwasher altogether has worked well for me. I pretend I don't see the way things get loaded, and the job magically gets done. Sometimes not having to do the job (even if you could do it better) is worth more than being right and in control.

Also, I hope my husband doesn't read comments today, or he might figure out that I've officially turned another chore over to him :)

Considering that I do dishes by hand, I'd just be happy to have a dishwasher to load at all.

That is if you are *really* talking about dishwashers.

If not, then my answer could be kind of funny.

I totally load the dishwasher like Chris.

My hubby chides me for it, almost every day. He comes home from work, fixes my dishwasher mess and tries to coach me on better arrangement.

It has turned into a joke, because I'm just not good at dishwasher dish arranging and have no interest in being coached. So I purposely put stuff in haphazardly. It's fun.

I think loading the dishwasher is a learned art. I am a rock star at loading ours to the max, but when faced with an unfamiliar dishwasher (like helping a friend or relative clean up after dinner) and I PANIC and FREEZE.

That said, I honestly would have done a better, more efficient job at loading those dishes in your (unfamiliar!) dishwasher. Sorry Chris.

Also, whatever happened with unloading the, ah, proverbial dishwasher?

In our house the dishwasher is ALL SWEETIE. He does the dishes every night, and woe be to the wife who tries to load the dishwasher because SHE SHOULD KNOW it's getting rearranged. It's fine. It makes him happy, and he's way better at it than I am.

But ask the man to pack the trunk? HE CANNOT DO IT. Does not compute.

Okay, don't shoot me but how does your way make any more space? Now, I too am quite particular about how the dishwasher is loaded, but I just don't see the point when either way only a plate or two more could be put in. Just my personal thoughts!

It must be chromosomes. Or DNA. Because YOUR way makes much more sense. Still...give him credit for even trying to load the dishwasher. That's a struggle for most XYs.

After reading the comments, I have just been informed that dishes are my duty now. My wife is Becky from the above comments.

Oh my eyes! Please warn us before posting that kind of thing!

I'm sorry but I don't have a problem with the way Chris loaded it. If you really want the extra time on your hands then you need to stop micromanaging. It took me a while to realize it doesnt really matter, if he does something to help then there is no point in me redoing it because then it didnt really help me in the first place. We both load the dishwasher as things get dirty and we run it whenever, neither of us rearrange what the other does. As long as they get clean it doesnt really matter.

In regards to your laundry post, I don't do laundry, when we started dating he complained about my methods of washing (generic soap, one load with nothing sorted). He is very particular on the brands and sorting by simliar fabric and colors. So that became his duty. He puts a load in before work and then transfers to the dryer after work and then he folds and puts away right after dinner. There are only two of us and he does a load a day.

I'm probably guilty of overloading the dishwasher. I load it efficiently, but I make that thing my bitch.

Yeah, I really wanted to be on your side about this...but I think I see more space left over with Chris' arrangement. Yours IS prettier and more organized, but if the point is space, I think Chris wins.

We spend so much time arguing about the damn dishwasher over here. The laundry, SHE IS MINE, leave her alone.

Hey - Is that plastic in the dishwasher?

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So the Fish Said...

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