November 23, 2004
How to piss me off
Frankly, there are lots of ways to piss me off, but here’s one example. Last night I saw a commercial I had not seen before. It was for an ovulation test. Most of the ad was a lesson in Biology 101 and was sanctimonious and annoying enough, but the tag line was what really got to me. “Because when you are ready to be a mother, nine months is long enough to wait.”
First, let me just say fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
Second, thanks so much for alerting me to your fabulous product which will be certain to lead to immediate pregnancy for me and everyone else out here who is struggling to get knocked up. It seems we are all just too damned stupid to figure out that ovulation is related to getting pregnant and thank our lucky stars that you have developed a product to solve all our problems. Good thing that’s the only issue at play here, at least according to your helpful ad.
Third, I’ve learned a lot over the last year. I’ve learned never to ask anyone when they are planning to have children. I’ve learned never to ask a pregnant woman whether it is her first baby. I’ve learned not to question people’s behaviors and choices in this area, even when some of those things seem unnecessarily strange or painful to me. Mainly I’ve learned that there are more people than I ever suspected who jump through all sorts of hoops to try to get pregnant and that, especially if you are trying to market a product to us, it pays to be a little sensitive to that fact.
Posted by Beth at November 23, 2004 10:46 AMOh, that sucks. How did that get past a test audience?
Posted by: bmh at November 23, 2004 11:31 AMI agree. A little sensitivity would be appreciated.
Can we sue for emotional distress or something?
Posted by: donna at November 23, 2004 11:33 AMWhen I was in my late teens/early 20s I figured getting pregnant only entailed having sex (and if you believed my mother and the catholic church it only took one time). Easy enough, I thought. And then I got a job at a place where a great number of women where going through a lot of work to get pregnant. It opened my eyes. Since then, like you, I've learned not to ask too many questions.
Posted by: patricia at November 23, 2004 12:09 PMI saw a print ad recently that bothered me for the same reasons. I wish I could remember the specifics, but it was an ad for a minivan and they had a picture of a guy with reference to how virile/how potent his sperm are that he would need to get a bigger vehicle to house his growing family.
Anyway, yes, you never know what people are going through. I was in your boat (at your age) and thankfully it all worked out. Good luck to you.
Posted by: Marcia at November 23, 2004 12:21 PMI too, have learned not to ask those questions. I'm 26 and have no children yet (but want to very much). People are always asking me when my husband and I are planning on having kids. We've only been married 6 months and would prefer to wait until I've finished college and we've been married longer. I am ALWAYS hearing "Don't wait too long" and getting asked by friends "Aren't you afraid you'll have trouble getting pregnant after being on the Pill for so long?"
Oh yeah, and to add to the misery, my (younger) sister is having her second baby in January.
To these people, I would like to say one thing...MIND YOUR OWN F'ING BUSINESS!
One of my favorite things to do when people ask me when I'm having children is to turn the table on them and ask them when THEY are having children. Kinda shuts them up real quick.
Hang in there!
you want I should find the guy who came up with that tab line and take him out and beat the crap outta him?
Posted by: Casey at November 23, 2004 02:42 PMwhat in the hell is that?? what is wrong with people? I'm not pregnant, and I'm not looking to get pregnant right now, so I can't relate in that aspect, but, as a woman who would like kids eventually, that is incredibly insensitive. that's like saying "oh, well you've tried for so long already, what's 9 more months?" *grr*
Posted by: Manda at November 23, 2004 03:19 PMFunny enough...yesterday I teased my classroom aide and asked her, as she was leaving the building, if she wanted to stay and do my parent conferences...that I'd switch with her. She grabbed her newly pregnant belly and said, "Only if you want to take this too."
Does she know I have fertility issues and I am 38 without a child. Probably not, but what a thoughtless thing to say nonetheless.
That's why I am the professional and she is the aid (and yes, I guess I just stooped to her level).
Posted by: Bari at November 23, 2004 06:07 PMI hate commercials like that. My least favorite thing lately is when people ask when we're going to have a brother or sister for the Girl. Hello, do you think we're not trying? It was so easy with the Girl (one time, first time), but almost three years later, still no sibling.
Posted by: Kelley at November 23, 2004 06:54 PMPREACH! PREACH PREACH! I just want to bitch slap the ad exec who came up with that one. Pissed. Me. Off.
Also trying to achieve "knockedupitude"
- erin
Posted by: erin at November 24, 2004 12:08 AMI am so sorry people, even Ad people, are so insensitive! GAH! I just wish I could make it better some how.
But I am glad you can vent here, and we all support, care and are kind to you! : ) And can make you laugh!
Ha, ha, ha - I'm glad I'm not the only one who uses the "Fuck you and the horse you rode in on" line.
As far as that stupid tag line - I am always amazed at what companies will say (or do) to sell a fertility product. It also amazes me that people still ask when other people are planning on having babies. It amazes me more that the same people will be all shocked and surprised and will continue to ask personal questions whatever answer is given to their first stupid and waaay too personal question.
Posted by: Irene at November 24, 2004 07:42 AMThere's something about the topic of kids that gives people the impression that they can ask or say anything without worrying about others' feelings.
They think nothing of touching a pregnant woman's belly, asking when they're going to finally have one, or comment on why they think three years is too much time between kids.
My standard explanation of how miscarriages tend to screw up the old schedule usually shuts them up quickly.
Posted by: Carmi at November 24, 2004 02:04 PMWhen people ask me when I'm going to give Kaitlyn a little sibling I tell them "I'll get right on that, just for you" and it stops them where they stand.
I'm sorry that that commercial ever made it to air. It sounds like an insensitive piece of garbage. Just keep having "the sex" and flip all those assholes out there ,that don't keep their mouthes shut, the proverbial bird.
Posted by: Kimmer at November 25, 2004 11:48 AM
