I put home-maker on my tax return

one word.

Mother.

Both the most wonderful and hardest occupation in the world if you ask me.

Credit where credit due.

"Unemployed", I guess. =/

or you could just go ahead and put "Domestic (and Sex) Goddess". I mean, what are they going to do? Audit you for your Sex Goddess-hood?

Homemaker.

Sitting or standing when not lying down.

homemaker.

initially i wanted to be listed as self-employed... but then i'd have to 'fess up and pay taxes on all my little side jobs, so we quickly scrapped that idea.

Yep, homemaker. Not nearly as posh as a well paying profession, but way more rewarding.

BUT, weren't you working (outside the home)this year before Mia was born? I think for the sake of taxes, this year you are whatever you were and on next year's taxes you will officially be a homemaker. Right?

Butt and nose wiper?

"Domestic Engineer" for the title-conscious...otherwise, Homemaker.

Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations

Anything where I have to fill out my occupation, I always put "Mother/Slave."

"Bridget Jones, wanton sex Goddess, with a very bad man between her thighs..."

You're right; IRS not known for their sense of humour. Personally I'd love to put;
"Occupation? I'm afraid I can't say. No, really, if I did I'd have to kill you..."

But then of course, I'm childish...

Ack! Forgot to leave my suggestion:

Stay at home mum?

Professional arse wiper?

Come round and find out, big boy?

...Or, yeah, homemaker sounds good.

I'd have to agree with Em, to put last year's occupation on, then next year go with "homemaker".

I also use "Domestic Engineer" on most things. I think the IRS prefers Homemaker....but screw em!

When I was a corporate peon I used to put peon on my tax return. No men in black ever came to take me away so, if you want to put Domestic (and Sex) Goddess, go for it.

Annie, maybe they did??

Maybe you've just had all knowledge of the event - gasp! - ILLIMINATED FROM YOUR BRAIN!

*cue, scary music, thunder clap, lightening bolt and sinister scary crazy evil laugh...*

Domestic Engineer. That is what you do, after all. I personally think Domestic Goddess is a screaming hoot though.

Forget the IRS what do you say at a party when asked? I'd like to tell questioners "None of Your Freaking Business", but haven't and it does show a certain amount of bitterness on my part.... I used to say 'Stay at Home Mom', but realized I was getting more respect (and sympathy) with Unemployed. Be careful with the Domestic Goddess on an IRS form, though, those literals might expect some income in the tip column if you put that. So, I have no answer, but I feel your pain at having a great job with terrific beneifts and no title, except...sigh "Mommy". You work at home, but receive no paycheck for your labor. The IRS is asking where your money comes from (isn't that the reason for that question?). No money, no title. Could you put Blogger? Assistant to Mia? Full-time care giver? Analyst? List Maker? Part time Songstress?

I was always fond of "Intergalactic High Empress".

Sorry, that title's taken. ;)

Starving artist?

As a CPA, I would recommend "Domestic Engineer" or "Household Manager." I think the IRS doesn't really care of the title, just the fact that you have no W-2, and it's always fun to screw with the government!

At the moment you could go with Volunteer Milk Lady.

Child Developement Specialist...or at least an apprentice!